The Acrimony Anomaly [Naruto Fanfic]

It's Because I'm in a Girl's Body!

    Tsubaki obviously couldn't be seen by the Kazekage all bloody with the Konohagakure symbol blazing on her forehead. Inoichi opted to go to a store to get her some new clothes while Kakashi had to find a person willing enough to have her bathe.

    It honestly made her happy, watching the bumbling shinobi clean up after her. Satisfaction made way to her lips with a smirk. Just this once, she'd let her old habit return. "Hn."

    The female Madara wasn't happy about not being seen in public, but with the idiots gone, she'd be free to go. She sneaked along the shadows of the buildings, hiding her chakra signature along with it.

    Suddenly, a familiar chakra pulsed out, causing the hairs on her neck to stand up. No, it couldn't be-!

     A different signature approached her. It was quite large and seemed very violent in the way it swirled with malicious intent.

     She went to move to another hiding spot but found that she couldn't. The Uchiha was stuck... By sand. She clucked her tongue in annoyance.

     A figure approached her, bloodlust seeping out. Finally in light, she could see that he was about her age, maroon hair, seaweed green eyes, and pale skin, not as pale as hers though. "Mother needs blood."

     She was about to get-the-fuck-out, but she stopped, cocking her head slightly to the right. "So you're offering to be a free cleaning service?"

    "Mother wants your-!"

     "Cool, you clean the blood off of me and my clothes and I'll give you some of my blood. Kapeesh?"

     The jinchuriki looked beyond confused. "Mother only wants-."

     A deadly aura surrounded her,"Kappesh?"

     The redhead cleared his throat and responded with what Shukaku had told him to say, "Kaposh."

    She let out a prolonged sigh, "At least the tanuki is smart enough, can't say the same thing about the host though."

     The poor boy didn't know what to do. The girl he had wanted to kill blatantly insulted him. What's even worse... Shukaku was laughing at him.

     She held out her bloody hand,"I'm Tsubaki Uchiha, one of the two new reincarnations of Indra Uchiha."

     "Subaku no Gaara... Mother."

     "You mean Ichibi-san, Shukaku-san. Ya, I know his beautiful name."

     His eyes widened as booming words rang throughout his mind. 'Don't kill her. Take her up on the deal though.'

     Tentatively, Gaara held her hand, shaking it softly as if he was holding glass. "Mother agrees to your deal."

     "Of course Shukaku-san did. I'm the Ma- Tsubaki Uchiha after all."

     If he had realized the Uchiha girl's slip-up, he paid it no mind. The gourd-wearing child's sand coiled around her, absorbing any of the blood seeping through her clothes or caking her skin. "Your turn."

     She was indeed blood-free and relished in the feeling of being clean again. Now, she had to slit her wrists... 

     Grabbing the kunai, she dragged it across her skin, making sure an okay amount of blood came out. Duping a bijuu was the last thing on her mind. 

     The sand rose up to meet her arm, wavered, and then greedily absorbed the blood. After that, she compressed the area to stop bleeding and wrapped a bandage around the self-inflicted wound.

     "Do you know where the Kazekage is?"

     He nodded and began to lead her away. Casually, she molded the sand into a 'snowball' while using chakra and tried to throw it at the unsuspecting boy. However, a wall stopped it from reaching its target.

     He gave her a murderous glare. "Whoa, whoa, I can explain. Back in the tree-hugger's lair, they have a thing called snow. Snow is crystallized water and kids usually molded them into balls and throw it at each other for fun. You can do the same with sand..."

    Fifty sandballs were surrounding Gaara, ready to launch right at her. "Oh hell, no."

    She was so fucked. They were surrounded by sand, the boy's strength that he could control. There was no source of protection.

     Tsubaki flopped on the ground as a last resort, spatting out the words,"If I play dead, I might not be killed."

     He deadpanned and let the sand fall to the sides, turning around abruptly to continue on their trip to the Kazekage. "M-matte!"

     The onyx orbed girl made a mad dash for him, making sure that she wouldn't be left behind. "That's dirty... How dare you do that to a lady?!"

     "Lady?" his eyebrow quirked slightly at this.

     She fumed red in anger and was about to rant until the familiar chakra spiked up a little bit again before disappearing. "..."

     Her eyebrows knitted together as she looked into the direction where it came from.

     "We're here."

     "Ah."

     The Uchiha didn't even notice the fact that they had arrived and sheepishly rubbed the back of her neck, ignoring the pain that surged through her arm. 

     The boy had turned and she had made her way up steps... And then one broke. "Kyaaaaaaaaaa! OMG! I'M SCREAMING LIKE A GIRL WHEN FALLING!"

     A pillow of sand enveloped her and safely brought her down to the earth. "Sweet land, I never want to leave you again."

     Gaara then went back to walking away, not really caring about the fact that he had saved someone... Most of it was Shukaku's work though. 

     With a pout, she decided to shunshin into his personal bubble and invade it with all she had. It had worked too. Her arms gripped tightly around the sand boy. "Arigato."

     With a smile, she pranced away, back to running up the stairs. Suddenly, her heart leaped, going even faster than before. Nervousness buzzed throughout her whole body and a red rouge appeared on her cheeks. "... What's going on?"

     "TSUBAKI IS HERE, MOTHERFU-! Oh hey, minna."

     Inoichi had his arms across his chest in a disappointed manner while Kakashi was sending her a death stare. "You were supposed to wait."

     "Life waits for no one... Oh, by the way, Inoichi-san, I think there's something wrong with me. I suddenly felt anxious, my heart sped up, and my cheeks turned red... Do I have an illness?"

     The Hatake looked up from his book with a 'are you kidding me' expression. "You're in love."

     Tsubaki laughed it off before seriously asking,"Wait, you're joking, right?"

     They shook their heads no.

     There was a long silence before a loud thump.

     Tsubaki Uchiha had a heart attack right there and then. Now, she was sprawled out on the floor.

(A/N: Yeah, she likes Gaara... But this ship is not canon. It's mostly for plot and to make things even more spicy in the drama.)