IT'S ALL IN YOUR HEAD

Chapter 37- The Effects

"That doesn't make sense, Kay." Rickey said looking at me sideways. "What doesn't make sense, idiot? He could have an effect on people that brings out their violent side," I said confused. "Oh yes," Rickey began," because Damian's charming smile and caring personality really makes me want to run through the streets killing people." I gave him a sarcastic straight up "Ha Ha" but he didn't react.

"But seriously," I said with a light voice," He has brought out a more violent side of me and I only know small things he is capable of. Who knows what influence he can have on people once he shows them that he wants to go blowing up the universe?"

Rickey seemed confused so he didn't respond to me. He just stood there by the window blank. I wanted to know what he thought but he stayed silent.

"Rickey," I began but Rickey butted in," How long has it been since you got this oh so magic idea?" I dropped my eyes to the ground. It had been almost three weeks. I wanted to say something but I was scared. I didn't want him to knock me down; things settled after I punched him in the face

"I got the thought after my fist tried to murder your face." He sighed hard and loud buried his face in his hands. "You idiot..."his voice trailed off. "Don't get all up in my face! I told you the truth! Your the idiot for for being such a jerk." I was so ready to ram my fist in his perfect face again but right before my fingers balled up, I had an epiphany.

"But what you meant by idiot is that I am becoming friends with and the closer I get, the more effect he has." I couldn't look his in the eyes. I didn't feel stupid. I wasn't ashamed. I felt conflicted. I didn't just feel friendship when I looked at Damian. I could feel that we had a connection that bound us tighter than if we were simply friends.

"I don't think you are stupid," Rickey put his hand on my chin and lifted my head gently," I know things you don't about Damian and you know things I don't. And I know that you are supposed to be friends with him. It's how this whole thing works. This is all just the effects of what is to come," Rickey didn't seem all to happy when he admitted that but I wasn't sure why.

I put my hand on my hip and sighed," Well I have to go and..." I paused," Umm... you know..." I walked away with out another word.

Rickey seem indifferent about me seeing Damian, like Rickey wanted me to be with only him but that made no sense. I was his best friend and I was not going to leave him. So I kept walking until I got the conference room and opened the doors.

Only one person was there. Damian.

He gave me a smug smile but the look on my face was utter confusion. "Hey, don't look to disappointed. Most people would kill to be alone with me," He winked at me but I rolled my eyes and sat down in the only other chair in the room.

"DO explain." I demanded. "Okay, bossy. There was a fight this morning and I was the only one who didn't join in so I got my privileges and no one else did." I smiled at him oddly,"Why wouldn't you fight?" I asked curiously.

"Because I wanted to see you," He said but I rolled my eyes," And because the fight was between my brother and my other brother so if I got in it, one of them might have killed me." I felt kind of bad for him now. I really didn't even know he had siblings.

"I know what you mean," I said quietly. "What?" He asked. "I mean, in a way, I know what you mean. My sister almost drowned me as a baby and the others are to scared of me to talk to me. And if I pushed them to speak to me, they might've killed me at one point."

The air was thick with that intensity that you feel when you open up with someone. "I didn't know you had siblings," Damian admitted. "Yeah well I have te...." I stopped mid-sentence. I almost said ten when I realized something that changed so much in my head that I didn't know how to go about it.

Someone came in the room and said that they needed Damian so he got up and left, not saying goodbye because my eyes were super glued to the ground. I didn't realize something and it made a slight, but drastic difference in everything.

I left that room and kept my eyes binded to the tile flooring. I was in my room when I raised my gaze. I shut my door and walked slowly to my bed. My mind was racing as I searched all of my memories to try and make sense of this new thought.

After sitting and thinking, I found what I wanted. I thought back to the day that I came clean to everyone about Xander.

"I was contacted as your emergency personnel because your mother is on a plane back from Houston." He said looking innocent. That look made me sick to my stomach but instead of being sick, words of sheer anger spilt from my mouth." Oh so now is the day you decide to turn up? Only when mom can't come to the rescue!? Is that how it works!? Kalvin's born and you leave because it's too much to handle but now is when you show up in my life. You need to leave. In fact dropping off the face of the Earth would be better. What makes you think that you can leave our family and then come back? You should have stayed at home with your new girlfriend and left me be. No matter the circumstances!" I said in my young voice.

The name ring in my head unceasingly. Kalvin. I never thought about him. He was one last reason my dad left. He didn't want this many kids. Kalvin was one more of us. One more screwed up kid in my family.

But I couldn't shake the feeling that Kalvin...

That Kalvin was part of The Damian Thing.