faking it ; shawmila ✅

chapter 3

(^this is the song that Camila sings in this chapter. Sarah Close has some amazing music so go check it out x)

-

Camila's POV

{present day}

I walked towards the backstage once I had finished my speech. I trailed close behind Shawn who hadn't spoken another word after telling me he missed me. Once we were out of the spotlight, Shawn turned around to face me, opening his mouth to speak.

I miss you too. I have missed you so much. Can we go back to how we were? Can we not argue anymore?

"Camila come on, you're on in ten minutes." Stacy came running over to me, distracting me from my train of thought.
"Can you give me-" I got cut off by Stacy who started pulling me away from Shawn and saying "You can talk to him later, just come on, we don't have the time."

I turned around towards Shawn, who stood there dumbfounded. I wanted to tell him something, anything, but before I could find any words, he was out of my sight.

I got changed and was ready in a bit. I warmed up my voice a little, going over the lyrics that weren't mine, but I was supposed to put up a face that said the song was close to my heart.

I got distracted every five seconds wondering when I could finally talk to Shawn again.

I need to tell him so much. I missed him more than he missed me, I was certain.

I was told to be backstage and after a quick flash of events, I was on stage.

A funky backing track started playing, I gripped onto my microphone, preparing myself to sing as my cue came on.

"He’s got a leather jacket and it’s around my shoulder
The love story never starts in October
A wink of his eye, a shot of delight
We keep it cool and say the other’s alright, but
He moves fast and I almost can’t catch him
We come together in a game of action
It is what it is, like nothing’s amiss
But we both know that this is something we’ll miss"

I looked over at the people at the front row and although I was told to look at Anthony while singing this song, I couldn't help but sing to Shawn. He stared back at me.

"Cause I know when you go that you’ll come back in my way
And I know when you do that I won’t mind"

We both just kept staring at each other and I got lost for a second, lost in him. Suddenly he was the only person I could see anymore.

How can I possibly fool myself into thinking I could stop loving him? I will always love him. I'll love how he looks at me when I'm signing, I'll love how he smiles from eye to eye when he watches me from a distance as he tries to cheer me on, I'll love how he holds me, I'll love everything about him, no matter how wrong it is.

"Cause I, I know what you think about me
As if it isn't plain to see that I got all you need
But when it tastes this sweet

"Cause I, I know what you think about me
As if it isn't plain to see we should just let it be
And if it tastes this sweet, then call me out"

Once my performance ended, people started clapping all around and both me and Shawn seemed to be jolted back into reality. He was as lost in the moment as I was. He finally started clapping along too. I muttered a "Thank you" into the microphone and waited for the lights to dim down.