My Name Is Vincent Ryan Keller

Chapter Twenty

What I felt was more than petrified.

I was useless again. The same way I felt when I caged myself while waiting for Catherine and JT to find the cure for my black outs. But no room for self-pity at the moment.

I left Catherine lying on the ground in her own blood. She was shot on her right shoulder and her head was bleeding. I still could not hear her breathe. I settled and hid myself behind a tree wishing that someone from the approaching car would help save Catherine.

I was grateful to Evan for it was him. He saved Catherine with a pocket knife and a flask of vodka. I finally heard Catherine gasped for air. Heather did a great job, too. She helped Evan with the procedure, did not panic and called 911 immediately. I listened to myself sighed with relief but not too long. Catherine was still unconscious. I was afraid of complications and the capacity of her body to handle the gun shot.

I was restless and shaking and began to growl a little. Heather must have heard since she looked back to the direction where I was and told Evan about it. He brushed off the idea but I was sure Evan knew someone else was there.

I wanted to help. I really do. But the whole time I was hiding behind the tree, I was on my other form. I could not get back being me. Maybe because I was so scared for Catherine, for myself. I could not lose her. Not ever. I wanted to be with her and ten years was not enough.

I did not care.

I entered the hospital just like anybody else. I went straight to the ER. I saw Evan at the visitor's waiting area comforting Heather who was shaking in tears. I was standing at the back and pretended to get coffee. The doctor came out and spoke to Heather and Evan. The bullet was out. Good. Her rib cage was fractured though and needed intense recovery. But more important was that Catherine was safe. We just needed to wait for her to gain consciousness. I hope it would be soon.

Catherine was move to a room. Evan and Heather went home. It was already past midnight but I did not feel like going home yet. I went in and it was dark. There was only a lamp that light up the room. Catherine was sound asleep. She had the EEG machine attached to check her brain activity. Looking at her that way broke my heart but the Catherine I knew for the last decade was tough and strong. I knew she would get through this.

Her condition was stable. A thorn was finally removed from my heart. I could go home and sleep in peace. I would be seeing you, Catherine.

Lab coat… check. Rubber gloves… check. Surgical mask… check. Patient's chart… check. Stethoscope… check.

I came in to the hospital as if I was a resident doctor in New York General. Well, I was. I found it funny and strange wearing this costume. The truth was I missed this outfit. Going back to the hospital kind of made me feel uncomfortable. Lots of memories and I somehow envied the doctors and nurses who were fulfilling their jobs helping people while I had to quit to save my own life.

Yes, I would forever be grateful to Evan for saving Catherine but you could not take jealousy away from me. I was a bit confident that he was just a friend to Catherine. It was just that I did not have the advantages that Evan had. I mean, people around them thought they were dating. What was I to Catherine, anyway? We never talked about it but I remembered she told me at the wedding that she thought she did have someone in her life. She was referring to me, right?

I was so glad Catherine was conscious and smiling when she saw me came in her room. As much as I wanted to take the credit for saving her life, I would rather give it to Evan. Yes, I participated but it was Evan who did the great job. I almost thought I lost her. At that moment of the accident, all I could do was watch her slipped away. But Catherine was amazing. She still thought I was responsible why she was still alive.