I hated talking to Tori sometimes. She makes me think she's in on the shit sometimes. In the beginning it was she who told me everything that went on between Jay and Beyoncé. At first it didn't bother me because I was use to Jay's cheating. It was Tori who made me realize that their relationship was more than his normal flings. So much was happening so fast and I didn't know who I could trust anymore.
I still couldn't figure out who have Jay a copy of the DNA test that was done on Drew and Bentley. For some reason, I suspect that Tori did it. Over the past few months her attitude towards me had changed. I was wondering if she some how she found out about me and Bentley. She had a lot of time to test her husband and my son since she was around them so much. That was the only scenario that made sense to me. I was stressed to the max dealing with all the problems I had.
I was on my way to my mothers house to drop my kids off. I had about two hours before it was time to be at my mother-in-laws house so I wanted to talk to my mom for a minute. I love my mom to death, but we don't talk very often. It's because she's always nagging me about something. My mother, Charm, was a very spiritual woman. Whenever she talked to someone, she would always take it back to the bible. She believe in God's word and everything it said. My sister's and I rarely missed a Sunday in church with her when we were younger.
As we got older we grew up and went our separate ways. My mother said that the reason we're having so many problems now is because we strayed away from the church. If I thought that going to church would bring my husband back home, I'd be there now. Jay meant that much to me. It has been four months since he left and the only time I see him is when he's picking up the kids. He answered the phone when I called, but if it wasn't about our kids he would hang up on me. He still treated Drew like his own even though two paternity test proved that I wasn't. That made me love him even more.
I knew that there was a possibility that Drew was Bentley's, but I was praying that he was Jay's. Bentley and I were sleeping together when Jay got locked up. It started with him helping me make extra money by selling weed.
After a few months of hanging out with each other, one night it just happened. It was never supposed to go as far as it did. It was understood that wasn't going to leave Jay and that I never wanted to hurt Tori.
Bentley was the one who introduce me to drugs. We would snort coke and then have sex in his house while Tori was at work. I thought it was a secret that I could take to my grave, but instead it came back to haunt me. As many times as I had forgiven Jay in the past, he couldn't forgive me this one time. He moved on with Beyoncé like I never existed.
And to make maters worse, he was flaunting her around the streets like she carried his last name. I was so sick of people calling and telling me that they had seen the two of them together. My sisters and all my friends would call me at all times of night saying that they seen the two of them together. I couldn't sleep most nights and my appetite was nonexistent. I've had to at least drop 30 pounds since Jay had walked out on me. I know that I was partially to blame for him leaving, but it was just as much of his fault.
"Ma," I yelled as I walked into my mother's house.
"I'm in the den!" She yelled back. My kids took off to the den to great their grandmother.
"Go up stairs and put your things in the bedroom. I got some ice-cream cups in the freezer." My mom told my kids. I sat next to my mom on the sofa and she started on me.
"Why are you losing so much weight, Courtney? That can't be healthy." My mother said in a concerned voice.
"I'm stressing, ma. I got a lot going on with me right now." I replied.
