Fumble (An OBJ story)

.31

~~ Linnéa Yari Brown ~~
Sunday 27 December 2015
Kingston, Jamaica.

"Come lemme talk ta yuh" my dad says standing up with purpose, causing us all to turn our heads.

"Who?" Victor asks. He knows it's between me and him because the other 2 are spick and span.

"Linnéa"

"Daddy why yuh haffi say mi name like dat?" I ask frowning.

"Yuh look ugly like dat. Come here gyal" he says as he leads out of the room. I follow behind him and we head in the direction of his office. He sits at his desk, forcing me to take a seat opposite him.

"This is very formal dad" I say frowning again.

"Wah mi tell ya? Yuh look ugly like yuh mudda"

"You're mad because you're not pretty like me and mama"

"Yuh callin me ugly?"

"Yes daddy"

"Mi was sayin yuh look like yuh mudda when ya frown"

"I do?"

"Beautiful beautiful girl but ugly when yuh frown"

"What did you wanna talk about daddy?"

"Your health" He says. I hear the shift in his accent and his tone, letting me know he's trying to speak without emotion.

"What about it?"

"You're having seizures and you know what happened-"

"Yes daddy I know what happened"

"Don't interrupt me Linnéa"

"Yes tata. Sorry tata"

"Your mams started having seizures when her cancer progressed because it had spread to her brain. You may not have breast cancer but you might have brain cancer Linnéa and you need to prepare yourself for what's to come"

"We've been through it before" I say shrugging my shoulders.

"No we haven't. You know I love your mother with everything in me. But she was my wife and you're my child and I'll be damned if you die before me"

"Well then let's pray to god I don't die" I say before swallowing hard.

"And you and your sister need to make amends because she's your backbone. You need her to get through this"

"Tata that's not my responsibility. She needs to accept the people I've chosen in my life. I can't hold grudges like you and her can. I love my family the way they are and Narvana can't stand them. She needs to come to me" I say and father sighs.

"She yuh sister an' she jus wan' what's best fi yuh an' she nah fi wan see yuh get hurt"

"I am an adult and if it comes back to bite me in the ass, it's biting mine, not hers"

"If you're sure you're sure baby" he says to me.

"Do you want me to go and tell Victor to get out? Or do you want me to get rid of my best friend? Or maybe the love of my life? Or my sister, my backbone? You can't pick between these people and I shouldn't have to"

"You can have whoever you want with you. Love of your life?"

"Come on now tata we don't talk about these things. I was juss feeling a little passionate is all"

"Odell is the love of your life?"

"Gosh tata. I haven't been loved by anyone in the same way that he loves me and I've never wanted to show anyone love the way I want to show him" I explain.

"Mi gwan put a bullet in his ass if he fuck up again"

"I hear you, I wouldn't try and stop you but I don't think you'll have to"

"What would you like to do with Brys?" he asks me after a long pause.

"Bryson is not going anywhere. He's staying with me regardless. I need him for my recovery, it's selfish for him to see me poorly but I need him" I say crossing my arms.

"Okay what about the Victor/Bryson situation?"

"He deserves to know. I will tell him"

"Alright Naya"

"Naya? So we done here?" I place my arms on the armrests, ready to get up.

"Nah. Come an' give your fadda a hug" I stand up and walk round his desk to hug him. He holds onto me tight.

"I'll be okay" I whisper.

"Group hug!!" Bryson screams as he runs into the room and hugs us both. Victor hears the scream and he joins. Mrs Smith joins also and I see Narvana standing at the door. I put my hand out and she slumps over but joins the hug.

"Thanks yall for being my family" I say.