Bastille and Ed Sheeran imagines/preferences

Song imagine for Carly

(This imagine is inspired by Ed Sheeran's song, Small Bump.)

Your POV: It's amazing how you can be so happy one moment, while the next it's all gone and you're left sobbing on the bathroom floor.

It all started out so well, after a few months of trying I finally got pregnant. Ed was of course ecstatic at hearing the news, constantly talking about how he'd teach him/her to play guitar and whether it'd be ginger like him, he sounded so proud of our child already, I was too. It's really all Ed and I had ever wanted; a family.

The morning sickness was a killer, for while I could barely eat at all in the morning and struggles through the day. But Ed was there, holding my hair back as I threw up another day's breakfast, whispering that everything would be better soon and to just imagine holding our baby for the first time, something that would make it all worth it.

Luckily he didn't have any tours booked for the next few months, there is one around month 6-7 but he'll be back for the birth, and that's the most important part.

Then there was the shopping, bottles, cribs, blankets, toys, car seats, high chairs and everything else under the sun, honestly it was pretty overwhelming for both Ed and I, but we bumbled through it, keeping the colours neutral and not buying too much as we didn't know the gender yet, it's too early.

The excitement, along with a little nervousness was building as the time went on. How painful would the labour be? What if something goes wrong? What if the baby's not ok? What if.....? Ed could see I was getting worked up and came over to hug me.

"Carly, love, everything will be fine. I promise you. Just calm down, would you like something to eat?" He says, in a reassuring voice that makes me feel instantly calmer.

"I know, I'm just overreacting really. Yeah I'd love some chocolate and sour cream, please?" I reply, suddenly feeling starving.

"That sounds gross! But ok, whatever my princess wants!" Ed says, getting the 'food' I wanted. Even though it sounds gross to him he knows better than to argue with a pregnant lady!

And that's how the first few months went, some days were hard but Ed and I got through them, and it will all be worth it in the end.

Ed was keen to start decorating the nursery, but he couldn't start without knowing the gender so he convinced me to find out at the next scan, the earliest we could do so. It's very exciting, will it be a girl or a boy? I didn't really mind, either would be amazing and he/she will be loved so much!

Today was finally the day, we were getting a scan to find out the gender. As always Ed accompanied me, something I was very grateful for, as it can be pretty daunting. Of course there'll be a few months when he won't be able to come. Don't think about stuff like that, you will be fine! I silently tell myself and brush the thought from my mind, really there's more important things to think about at the moment.

Arriving at the hospital and getting out of the car, Ed being a true gentleman opened the for for me.
I found myself feeling a little nervous, but mostly excited. This is one of the most groundbreaking parts of having a child.
Squeezing Ed's hand a little tighter we both step inside.

"Ok I'm just going to put the jelly stuff on, if may feel a little uncomfortable at first." The nurse, who's name turns out to be 'Sally,' tells me.

She's not wrong, it does feel pretty weird, but I'm fine. The excitement of finally knowing the gender is keeping me mostly calm.
Once she finished it was time for the moment of truth, what gender will the baby be?........

Ed's POV: From the moment Carly told me that she was pregnant it was all I could think about, would the little one have my ginger hair? My dimples? Her smile? Would it love music too? Or be sporty? Will it be a girl or a boy? The questions go on and on, I was just so excited!! The months flew by, Carly did get morning sickness for a few of them, it was hard to see her like that, and I felt kind of helpless because I couldn't make her feel better, but we got through it.

Eventually the day arrived when we could find out the gender of the baby, Carly wasn't sure that she wanted to know at first but I convinced her to, then we can decorate the nursery and get clothes!!

We get out of the car, heading into the hospital and Carly grabs my hand, I can feel she nervous but I know everything will be ok.

Your POV: .....I'm sorry..."

And that was the moment my heart broke in two.
The words that fell from her mouth were some that I never expected to hear. "I can't seem to find the heartbeat, let me che-oh....I'm sorry....I didn't even need to let her finish, it was pretty clear. The baby was dead, gone, never going to be born. I just can't believe it, the tears quickly start rolling down my face.

I must have zoned out because next thing I know Ed's opening my car door, just like before, before my heart was shattered.
He starts driving and I hear the last few words of a song I know only too well, Small Bump.

Maybe you were needed up there,
But we're still unaware as why.

I've never connected to a song more and feeling Ed's emotion just pushes me over the edge, I'm now sobbing uncontrollably.

Arriving home I'm still a mess, and I'm sure I look even worse, but right now I don't really care. All I can think about is how I'm no longer going to have a baby, it's over and nothing can change it. Fuck.

Ed's POV: I can't believe now of all times my song had to play on the radio, sure it was only the last few words but they mean the most to this situation. It's something that can't have a happy ending.

I never thought this would happen, not to us, everything was going to be great. I would be a Dad and Carly would a Mum, it was going to amazing, a dream come true. But fair tales very rarely come true, and this is no exception. Those few words killed Carly, I could see it in her tear-filled eyes, and who wouldn't be broken after finding out their unborn child was dead? I don't feel great either, honestly I feel so shit, words can't even explain how I'm feeling right now.

When we get home Carly is still sobbing, nothing I say can stop her.
We walk inside and she walks, or stumbles, into bed, her tear-stained face breaking my heart even more, I don't know how we're going to handle this....

Your POV: Ed, where are y-. I mumble before yesterday's events come back to me in a painful punch of horror.
I now wish more than anything that I could be asleep again, reality didn't bother me there. But sadly I can't sleep forever, though I really feel like trying right now.
Checking the clock I realise that I've been sleeping for almost a whole day, shit! But I guess it's not like vie got anything better to do, not when I'm like this anyway.

Entering the lounge room I notice Ed curled up on the sofa, holding his guitar in his arms. I can see he's lying next to a notebook, more specifically his song writing book, taking a quick peak I see some lyrics that are truly heartbreaking, poor Ed,not like I feel any better though.

But the look on his face is one of happiness and peace, something I don't want to take away from him by waking him up, so I just leave him there and go make a coffee, maybe it will make me feel a little better, who am I kidding? Nothing can stop the pain I'm currently feeling.

"Oh! You're awake, Love! How are you feelin-sorry stupid question umm...." Ed appears beside me and starts rambling on before I silence him with my lips. The feeling of his lips on mine helps a little, honestly.

"Ed, I'm so sorry. This is all my fault!" I say, the tears again falling.

"Carly this is not your fault! Don't ever say that! No one could have done anything. Listen to me, it's not your fault! We're going to get through this, ok?" He replies, easing a little of the guilt I was feeling.

"Uh huh Ed, I'll try alright?"

"How about we lie down for a little bit, I missed you last night." I ask, drying a few of the tears that fell.

And suddenly we're lying in bed together, me cuddled up against him with his lips pressed to my neck. I now know everything will be ok, it will be hard and heartbreaking but we will get through it.
Tough times test people and I think Ed and I will pass, perhaps even bringing us closer together.

A
*AN* (sorry I didn't update for so long) This one is for @CarlyGipson, I hope you like it :) @Annabelle900 I'm starting on yours now and should have it posted in a few days :) xx Bella