"Only in the darkness can you see stars."
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It has been six years since Ben Solo succumbed to his fate and betrayed the Jedi Order after being seduced by the Dark Side. With the aid of his immense power, the First Order has cast a shadow over the g...
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"I need to talk to you," I answer, "unfortunately." I add under my breath.
He hears, of course.
His dark eyes narrow on the lilac sweater in my grasp, held stiffly at my side.
The corridor seems frozen in deafening silence as I wait for his next move.
After heavy consideration, the kind I can pick up on without reading his thoughts- which are guarded as they often are by the walls he had built for the sole purpose of keeping me out- he steps back enough that I am able to push into the room.
"Speak." He orders, and I frown. Not if you're going to order me around like some subordinate, I think loudly enough that he will easily catch it. The only response I earn is a slight, pulsing clench of his jaw.
I raise the sweater, focusing on it as intently as his own gaze focuses on me.
"I will never be able to forgive you, for what you've done... everything you've taken from me," I pause, my voice cracking. I hug the sweater to my chest, blinking back the wetness that has pooled into the corners of my eyes. I clear my throat.
"You single-handedly ruined just about everyone and everything I cared about... including yourself. I won't forgive you for that... not ever." He doesn't even flinch at my honesty, but he can no longer meet my eyes. I can see the faint green in his as he stares intently at the floor, the flick of his tongue wetting his soft, plump lips. I suddenly feel as if all the wind had been knocked out of me as I notice these little things.
"But I want to say that I'm sorry, for how I reacted to this. I was only trying to anger you." I hold up the sweater, enough that it will catch his line of sight.
I contemplate my next words, but decide to take the leap.
"I'm grateful that you held onto it. It gives me hope, in some strange way. You're not completely gone." I voice the last part very lightly, and his head snaps up at my words, practically fast enough to break his neck. His constellation of freckles are a dark contrast to his reddened cheeks, another variance to his harsh frown.
"This is who I am now. Your Ben.. he doesn't exist anymore." replies Kylo, finally. His tone is razor sharp, the words spit out as if having to utter them to get the point across leaves a bad taste in his mouth.
"Right." I can't help the disappointment that crosses my face. He studies me, unmoving I sense him trying to probe my mind, to peer at the thoughts swimming inside, but I shut him out before he has the chance.
We simply stare at each other for what feels like hours and hours, when it's likely that only minutes have passed.
Despite the unspeakable things he has gone through, the horrible acts he has committed, he truly has grown to be even more beautiful than I could have ever imagined. He was adorable when I first fell for him, his features always boyish and a little too big or mismatched. He's grown into them all now... while his ears may still be too large as well as his nose, they fit him perfectly. His hair isn't messy, it's perfectly disheveled. His freckles are still endearing. And his eyes, while they are still a perfect hazel-brown, they're noticeably missing the sparkle they once held.
Snap out of it, Lyra.
If only there was a way that I could tell Leia she could still grasp at her little shred of hope.
Then, briefly forgetting myself, I reach forward and tuck away a small curl that had fallen over his forehead.
His eyes widen at the contact, and so do mine. In my fleeting moment of weakness, my walls crumbled and my thoughts travelled from my fingertips into the exact place that they do not belong. His mind.
The rage overtakes him. His aura turns red, flaming, his fists clenched and shaking. He snarls, baring his teeth, darkened irises zeroing in on my face.
"I see what this was really about. You're just faking this sentiment so that I'll let you go-"
"Kylo, stop-"
"Then you can run back into the arms of my mother, who you only find solace in because you've never had one of your own." He screams, gloved hand finding the hilt of his lightsaber.
The silence is deafening. Time stands still.
Then, SLAP.
The sound of my palm making contact with his cheek reverberates so loudly on the metallic walls, I wouldn't be surprised if it was heard galaxies away.
He hisses. I don't wait to see his reaction.
I slam through the door, escaping the room before he could catch sight of the tears that had began to fall over my cheeks.
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SURPRISE ANOTHER NEW CHAPTER BC I FELT BAD THAT I TOOK SO LONG TO UPDATE
I KNOW I SAID I WAS GONNA MAKE THE CHAPTERS LONGER BUT THIS ONE IS GONNA BE AN EXCEPTION ONLY BC IT WAS A FITTING WAY TO END THIS SPECIFIC CHAPTER LOL
also, i'm not sure if i've made this clear but so far everything in this story that has happened has taken place before the events of the force awakens, but those things will be happening ~very~ soon of course!
i hope u liked it! don't forget to vote, comment n share, and let me know what u thought of the chapter!!
