How He Broke

Starting Over (Tate's POV)

I sat by the window in the library, staring out at the world before me.

The birds were finally coming back. I wish I could be like them; get away when its cold and come back when it's warmer... that would be so nice.

I rested my head against the glass, closing my eyes.

"Is this seat taken?" A familiar voice spoke, causing me to open my eyes, my heart halting.

"Uh.. no go ahead." I answered, making sure not to look up and make eye contact. I knew exactly who it was just by seeing those beat up high tops.

She set her backpack down on the ground, taking a seat on the ledge beside me.

"I just want to say... that I'm sorry." She said softly.

I shook my head, still not daring to look up at her, "Don't be. I was wrong... I shouldn't have said those things to you and I definitely shouldn't have attacked Matty like that." I apologized in return.

"Don't be sorry, Tate. You made a lot of great points... even if they were kind of harsh to hear like that." She said with a soft laugh.

Silence.

I didn't know what to do now. Should we hug? Shake hands? I wasn't sure what the protocol was when the girl of your dreams walks back into your life after you pretty much fucked any chance you had up.

"So... I heard you and Skyler are dating! Congratulations." She said, forced enthusiasm.

I cringed at the thought, especially knowing what I do now about her.

"Uh yeah.. About that." I began to explain.

"I mean it's great! I'm glad you found someone as great and gorgeous as her." She cut me off. "I'm really happy for you, Tate." She said, her voice trailing off at the end.

I nodded, biting my lower lip to keep my mouth shut.

Silence yet again.

I hated this. I hated this so much. I just wish it wasn't this awkward. I wish it was normal, but it would never be normal after all that I had done wrong.

"It's your fault. She hates you." The voice in my head spoke.

I winced, not wanting to believe it but I knew it was true.

I ruined everything...

I stared down at my lap, my eyes trailing off to hers, seeing she was wearing those damn black leggings; classic Sage.

Her hands rested on her lap, her fingernails painted a metallic blue; the paint chipped probably from her anxiously picking at it.

The same rings I had always seen her wear on his fingers were back now; Skyler had told me that they belonged to her grandmother. That's why she wore them all the time, but when she was with Matty she didn't. I wonder why that was.

I took a deep breath, mentally preparing myself to look up and face her.

My eyes trailed upwards. She was wearing a cropped black and white shirt underneath a read and black flannel. That's the Sage I knew.

Her long wavy brown hair was down, the top of her head covered by a black wide brimmed hat; something kind of like a sunhat but smaller. She stared out the window, not noticing that I was even looking at her.

She was so beautiful and radiant without even trying.

She peered at me from her peripheral vision, turning to face me.

She smiled, a blush forming on her cheeks as looked back down at her hands.

I noticed the glow about her, pink in color. It radiated around her, almost angelically. It was fascinating, I wanted to touch it but I was too afraid that it would ruin it.

"Why are you staring at me like that?" She asked softly, noticing the way my eyes shifted over her, examining the floating color that surrounded her.

"There's this... thing on you." I said, not fully sure what exactly it was.

She raised an eyebrow, holding out her arms to examine them for herself.

"Where?" She asked, not seeing it.

"It's all around you." I said, extremely fascinated by it.

"My aurora?" She asked, suddenly very intrigued. "What color is it?"

"Pink." I answered, watching as her face lit up.

"Woah.. that's so cool." She grinned at me.

I returned her smile.

"I really missed you, Tate." She said, a small smile as she looked down again.

"I really missed you too, Sage." I said, allowing a small smile to form across my lips as well.

We looked up at each other as the exact same moment, our eyes meeting. I had such a strong urge to lean over and press my lips to hers; but I held back, resisting the temptation.

"I-" She blushed, looking down at her hands again as she started to pick at her nail polish. "I don't want to lose you, Tate..." She finished. "I know what I said was awful, but I was just so hurt by how you reacted." Her voice trailed off as she stared down at the flake of paint that fell on her lap. "I just want you to know that you aren't a monster.." She said, looking up at me. "I talked to your mother the other day.. She kind of explained to me that you have problems. That you handle things differently." Sage explained, keeping her gaze from mine. "And for awhile I was so scared of you. I was scared because you almost killed Matty. You took drugs to numb yourself of the pain, and I realize that now." She said. "I was so wrapped up in how hurt I was over you, I didn't dare think that even for a second you were hurt too..." She explained. "And for that, I'm truly sorry, Tate. I'm sorry for letting Matty talk down to you, I'm sorry for avoiding you, I'm sorry for everything. You became so important to me so fast I just-" She sighed. "I just didn't know how to handle it. I don't usually get close to people that fast... but you're different, Tate. It felt like everything I had ever been afraid of was taking place and I ran from it." She looked up to finally meet my gaze as she explained herself to me.

"Tate, I know it may be a lot to ask... but do you think we could just.. Start all over?" She asked with a sheepish smile.

"What about, Matty?" I asked. I really hated him still, and I was in no position to put up with any of his shit.

"I'll talk to him about it." She answered. "I just hate the feeling that I'm missing someone as important to me as you." She explained.

"I know the feeling." I smiled, letting out a small chuckle.

"Okay, so how about we start over then? Like nothing ever happened between us. We can start fresh." She smiled.

I nodded, "I'd like that a lot."

"Okay, great!" She smiled, standing up and grabbing her bag.

"What are you doing?" I laughed, watching her.

"You'll see." She smiled, "Just go along with it. Act like you're just looking out the window." She instructed.

I laughed, shaking my head; deciding to go along with it anyway.

I peered out the window as Sage approached.

"Hey! I saw you sitting over here all alone, and I was wondering, would you mind if I joined you?" She asked, her bag hanging off of her shoulder.

I nodded, "Go for it."

She smiled, setting her bag down as she took a seat. "Hi, I'm Sage" She said, holding her hand out to me.

"Tate." I took her hand, shaking it.

"Well, Tate, I think this is going to be the start of an amazing friendship." She grinned, causing me to laugh.