“brendon, we gotta talk” tyler finally said after a moment of silence, awkwardly writing in the registrar. he dropped the pen unto the cover of the thick, long book and focused his attention on a curious looking brendon.
“yeah?” brendon breathed out in expectation.
“um, so i know you like me and every thing” tyler began, watching as brendon's eyes widened in horror so he quickly continued, “but i'm really sorry, bren. i, er, i actually like josh” tyler said awkwardly, scratching the back of his wrists.
he didn't know how to let people down because he never had to.
“oh” brendon processed it for a bit and then smiled, “i knew that already, ty. i guess i kinda just hoped. . .” brendon shrugged, trailing off. his hands were in his pockets and he was shuffling on his feet.
“i'm sorry, brendon” was the only thing tyler knew to say.
and brendon scoffed and chuckled, “for what? being attractive? i blame jesus”
tyler couldn't help but giggle lightly, using his hands to cover his mouth a bit. brendon looked on fondly but quickly shook his head and reminded himself to forget about tyler.
“you know, when i first met you, i never knew i'd get this attached. i told my self to be just a friend and nothing more because i saw the way you were with josh and everything. but i couldn't help myself because you helped me through some tough times in my head, ty, even without knowing. you saved me and it's a shame i'm gonna have to leave that behind” brendon shrugged lightly, his eyes darting across the library. any where but tyler's eyes, he told himself because if he looked into those honey brown eyes, he was most likely going to break down.
“leave that behin--- what're you talking about, brendon?” tyler asked in concern. it was ridiculous but his mind immediately went to the thought of brendon committing suicide and his stomach churned.
“i get too attached, tyler. now to get over you, i'm gonna have to stay away from you, else i'll kill myself with these feelings. i'll suffocate. what that entails is i'm gonna have to stop coming here, tyler. we can't be friends any more” brendon explained as slowly as possible.
tyler's eyes widened in realisation.
“no, bren, please. we can work this out, we can do something. don't leave me, please.” tyler begged. brendon was his only other friend. without him, days at the library would be bland and slow and pointless. tyler would be losing a great friend. there'd be no-one to make him laugh and make fun of his clothes and listen even when he spoke really slow and stumbled over his words, there would be no brendon.
his friend was leaving.
brendon chewed the inside of his mouth for a moment and then swiped his longs over his lips, wetting them. then he smiled a very painful smile and he said the words that broke tyler's heart.
“good bye, tyler” and then he was gone.
just like that, tyler lost another one. except this one only managed to say goodbye.
|| - //
so tyler lost brendon and the next chapter is the last. what's good?
YOU ARE READING
kill your mind: joshler
Fanfictiona few years after the murder of his parents that traumatises tyler a great deal, he meets a red head damaged boy who moves into the empty house across the street. tyler confides in josh more than he had his siblings but something's wrong. no one els...
