You're Blooming the Wrong Way

Chapter Thirty-Two

"I'm such a hypocrite. I'm no different from Dad, after all."

For the nth time, I drowned myself in beer. Seated in front of me was my twin brother, Lars, who seemed genuinely elate with the sudden turn of events. When I told him that I had broken up with Haru, he shamelessly caroused in alcohol, as if my heartbreak deserves a celebration. I wanna punch someone right now.

"I broke my faith to Haru." I kept on chanting to myself.

Upon remembering the look on his face, I broke down into tears. Hindi ko alam kung kailan ko mapapatawad ang sarili ko dahil sa ginawa kong pananakit sa kanya. I don't deserve to be forgiven.

"Aren't you going to say anything?" umiiyak kong tanong sa kapatid ko dahil kanina pa siya walang imik sa harapan ko. Lars looks so pleased, and he's even humming a song! "Comfort me, at least!"

"Nope." His lips cracked into a sweet smile. "You don't deserve to be condoled, my dear sister. Why are you even down in the mouth? Haru should be the unhappy one. Sino bang nakipaglaplapan? Ikaw, 'di ba? Anong iniiyak-iyak mo diyan?" pang-asar niyang sabi.

Out of exasperation, I raised my middle finger to him.

"Oh, no. Don't play the victim card, Lucy. Sa totoo lang, wala kang karapatang mag-inarte." Lars made a mocking face. "How many times have I warned you? I told you that you're choosing the wrong person, didn't I? If only you listened to me." He clicked his tongue.

"I was confused that night!" katwiran ko.

"You're not confused. In reality, you're just a slut. Do you hear me? You're just a fucking slut." He retorted, stressing each word to me. Nasaktan ako sa sinabi niya pero pilit ko itong itinago. "How hard was it to push Hana? You could have run, but you chose to stay. You brought this upon yourself." My brother told me without restraint.

The truth hurts, indeed.

"Naiintindihan mo ba, Lucy? Malandi ka. Tapos ang usapan."

I burst into sobs. "Tama na! Be a little considerate to me!"

Lars simply rolled his eyes to me. Bumalik na siya sa pagkanta at hindi na ulit niya ako pinakialaman. I, on the other hand, took my time drinking and reflecting at the same time.

I wonder if Haru's despondent just like me. Ano kayang ginagawa niya? Is he crying? Does he miss me? Mahal parin ba niya ako?

I have no shame. How can I have such selfish thoughts?

I kept on crying to my heart's content. Si Lars naman, mukhang wala talagang pakialam sa akin dahil hindi na niya ako pinansin. However, he stayed with me. I secretly smiled to myself upon realizing that he was comforting me in his own way. Sinamahan parin niya ako rito kahit halatang inaantok na siya.

"Thank you for staying here with me, Lars."

"Ha?" Hindi naman maipinta ang mukha niya. "Don't get ahead of yourself, you fool. I'm here because I'm waiting for Mom." aniya.

We tilted our head to the right when we heard the front door opening. Truth to be told, our mother arrived. May dala siyang mga supot at agad naman siyang sinalubong ng magaling kong kapatid. Come to think of it, things didn't go well the last time we met.

"Umiinom kayo?"

"Yes, because your excellent daughter cheated on her boyfriend." walang hiyang sagot ni Lars sa kanya. "Anyway, I'm going to sleep. Thanks for this, Mom." My brother said, referring to the thing he probably asked her to buy. I guess he wasn't lying when he told me that he's waiting for her.

When our gazes met, my twin brother snickered.

"Pathetic."

My jaw dropped in disbelief. Before I could even rebut, he hastily retreated to his room, leaving us behind. That asshole! Who's he calling pathetic?! More importantly, why did he leave me alone with Mom? Alam naman niyang hindi pa kami okay!