He's the one, I know it (Troyler)

It's not your fault

Troye's POV

I sat around the cold, dingy hospital for what felt like years, clocks ticked in an empty rhythm all around me, everything went slower and for the first time I noticed things around me, when I was with Tyler everything was sunny, but that's not the real world here, I've seen people break down here, families broken and loved ones lost but I've also seen beautiful reunions and births all around me. I had to bring the sunny side back toTyler, and I knew what I had to do for him. Truth be told Tyler was only in the ward for two days, yet those two days were painful, the first day he spent in hospital he was under constant testing and scanning, they asked if they should check his sexual health so I assumed Tyler would want to know, and they scanned all his vital organs, the next day he regained consciousness but he refused to speak to me, I was so hurt that he didn't want me, later that day I was sat in his room tears rolling down my face,

"Do you not want me anymore?" I whispered to myself, I was patient with him, my baby was hurt and pushing would make it worse, just then Tyler grabs my wrist and pulls it up towards him kissing my hand gently,

"Only you" he sobs out slowly pulling me into him "I only want you to hold me, Troye, to protect me and love me, because I love you" Tyler bursts out half crying, it was the first time he had spoken to me since I left for the supermarket that day and his voice was raspy and deep as always, yet it sounded broken and painful

"Always and forever, baby, only us" I say to him, kissing his forehead.

Tyler's POV

Everything still hurt but with him here I felt safer, at first I couldn't face him, I felt so dirty and unfaithful like I had let Troye down, "I'm so sorry I did this, Troye" I whisper to Troye, grabbing tightly onto his hair. He pulls back from me and looks me in the eye, concerned "I broke our promise, I-I've betrayed you t-this is a-all m-m-my fault.." I say fading off towards the end of my sentence to pained to continue,

"Hey" Troye says holding my face in his hands and I flinch at his touch, it was the first sincere touch I've felt in a while after what had happened and numerous prods from doctors "This; what has happened, will never be your fault! Okay? Whoever did this to you is to blame baby" Troye says looking at me differently to normal, less loving and more sympathetic, I will forever blame myself for this. I should never have dated Josh in the first place and I put myself in this situation,

"Josh" I say to Troye and he looks back over at me grabbing both my hands "Josh did this" I say letting out a deep breath, Troye's eyes fill with anger as a tear of full rage runs down his face,

"That boy from Michigan?!" He says and I weakly nod my head closing my eyes in pain "baby I PROMISE you" Troye starts half shouting through gritted teeth "I will NEVER let him near you or us EVER again, okay? Your safe and I will send him down, I can promise you that." Troye interlocks his fingers with mine and kisses each of my fingers "I love you Troye, I love you so much but I-I-I can't go to the police, they'll make me tell them everything about before."I hadn't even told Troye what Josh did to me.

"Baby you can trust me, you know you can tell me anything you need to?" Troye deserved to know but I definitely did not want to drag it all back in Josh's mind especially if he wasn't charged.

"Troye , you know me and Josh were together at one point a-a-and this wasn't the first time he had done this to me, but it was the worst" I say to Troye gaining my strength to pull all my repressed memories back up, "Tilly what do you mean not the first time?" Troye replies tears once again being held back in his eyes, eventually I work up the courage to continue.

"I'd been abused both mentally and physically, but rape wasn't a new thing with him when we were together he would do this to me a-and I dismissed it as his right, I was his boyfriend after all, after 2 years I realised he was the one in the wrong and the fact I no longer loved him was not an excuse for the wretched things he did to me, so I left" I finish a tear rolling down my swollen cheek

"Babe" Troye says leaning his forehead against mine

"Hey" I say to Troye, smiling at him "And i've only come up from there, I've found true happiness in my self and my family, I've got great friends and a career but most importantly I've got you baby, the love of my life, which is why I think we should wait before I inform the police, he's gone I promise" I breath out once more, I'd told Troye all my secrets, nobody else knew about my relationship with Josh or anything about the abuse, which is why I wasn't ready to tell the police "I never even knew, I'm so sorry, baby" Troye says to me stroking over my hand with his thumb "It's not your fault baby" I say turning towards him in my bed "it's not your fault."

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GUYS IM BACK AND SOOO HAPPY TO BE WRITING here's a shorter chapter there will be a longer one to follow I basically have the same excuse as always 'GCSE'S ARE FUCKING STRESSFUL' so yeah i love you all 110k reads what the fudgekins happened there huh? so yeah it will get happier I promise!! I can hear some familiar bells in the distance......... ;) BYE BUYS if you had the courtesy to continue reading this add 'NOPE nope nopity nope' to the end of your comment

bye-S x :)