He's the one, I know it (Troyler)

What was that baby?

Troye's POV
Two more nights passed in my fake secure bubble and every night I had to comfort Tyler, tell him "we're safe" though I could never believe what I was saying and I'm sure that he knows it, we leave for Australia in two days and then I know we are safe, far far away from the toxic human who betrayed Tyler's trust. "Hey baby" Tyler Says clutching his arm as he walks into the living room where I'm sprawled across the couch watching a film "hi sweetie" I say opening my arms and gesturing Tyler to fill the space "how are you feeling?" I ask him, I know it's a stupid question but it was something I needed to know, to be able to help him.

"Honestly Troye, I'm feeling better and if rather move on from it, push it away not forget nor forgive but move past" he he replied in a calm and mature tone of voice cuddling into my chest "if you are sure I mean, Tyler! you can't just let him do this!" I start to say slightly hysterically until Tyler places one finger over my lips "leave it baby, please, for me" I can't fight with him, his pain is obvious and I have to play his ball game, I snuggle back up with him stroking his arm as we watch mindless 'celebrities' try to make it big on TV.

Tyler's POV
I just loved the feeling of being in his arms, knowing even after how dirty and used I was, the fact he still wanted me refreshed me, he's often told me since that day that I'm not dirty nor used, yet, the feeling is undeniable, a true urge to admit I'm not worthy of him yet still majorly desperate for him to still love me, whilst still remaining courteous of our short lived passionate romance if he decides to leave. Troye is lying back against the couch with his legs curled around me "what is it that you like about this show?" I ask far to quietly, mostly mumbled it's unlikely Troye heard me, he looks up at me "what was that baby?" His words sent a bittersweet tingle through my spine and my mind snapped to exactly where I had heard that before...

My mind flashes and suddenly I can see him there, hear him feel his disgusting lips burning the skin of my neck his eyes burning holes in mine his hands brushing my hips, "I've come to claim what's rightfully..." My shoulders seize up as he grabs them "Mine" he whispers in my ear his breath making my body shake in fear and anger "No" I whisper through gritted teeth pulling out of his grasp "what was that baby?" His disgustingly putrid voice spits out at me, "those words those four fucking words started it all"....

"NO" I scream out pushing myself away from the man wrapped around me "JOSH NO GET AWAY FROM ME DONT TOUCH ME" I scream falling to the floor sobbing violently "baby hey hey hey, no it's me, it's Troye, he's gone baby, he's all gone" Troye says rushing down to the floor and placing his arms around my neck to comfort me but I wince at his touch "I need to lie down" I let out shakily "I'm sorry" I say pushing myself up off of Troye and walking to my bedroom wiping my eyes, I don't look back at Troye, too broken by my own memories but I can tell he's watching me go, I left Troye sat on the floor clutching his knees and I fell onto my bed, curling into myself chanting the same pathetic message "it's not my fault, it's not my fault, it's not my fault" though deep down I felt it all was.

Troyes POV
I didn't move for a good ten minutes when Tyler's left not even looking up from where I was sat, I couldn't bear to think what I had done, I could only assume what I said had triggered something in Tyler, something that still held putrid memories of Josh for him and I wish that I had known or tried to make myself aware of triggers, my phone goes off and interrupts my self diatribe on the matter. I lift my phone to see my screen flash with a text from a withheld number, as I unlocked my phone I could feel tension in my stomach build until I saw the message and everything dropped at once my heart and the tension everything I had was spinning and it wasn't going to stop.
"Stay far away from me and the police, I've had my fun and I will have it again just maybe not just with Tyler, don't test me Troye you know exactly who the fuck I am, and you don't know what I'm capable of, I suggest you keep yourself and Tyler in a very straight line, or you might just see me again"

Josh. Fucking josh.

It's eating away at me every second. I can't keep him safe. I'm a shit boyfriend. I can't love him enough. I can't support him. I'm holding him down. I ruined him. I put him in danger. I'm pulling him away. I'm stealing him. I'm ruining his career. With every sickeningly toxic thought that runs through my head I find myself falling deeper and deeper into my own desperation so far I can no longer see clearly nor hear more than my breathing and my heart throbbing I just lie surrounded in my own fear and self destruction, as the panic overwhelms me I can't help but curl into a ball absorbed in terror.

My hearing springs back as I hear a panicked yet sweetly hushed "Troye" slip from Tyler's mouth as he places two strong hands on my waist and pulls me into his body, "calm baby boy" he whispers as he pulls my damp, breathless, panic shaking body into his lap "Tyler's here calm down baby, Tyler's here" he hushes out as he strokes my hair "baby boy we will be okay"

Tyler's POV
I knew about the text I got it too I sensed that it was what set off the panic attack in Troye I knew we wouldn't talk about it but I couldn't wait anymore there was something I had to do, and it has to be now...

---/------------------------
SURPRISE 🙌🏼🙌🏼🙌🏼🙌🏼
I promised July to a few people through private messaging but guess what? Here is your chapter I know it's been a long time and I really appreciate all of your kind words, patience, and support through this time, I'm glad to have written again and I'll try not to leave it as long.
I'm going to take the opportunity to ask those of you courteous enough to read this to check out the stories Omega and Addictive heart by NialllsAngelicx here on wattpad they are not Troyler ship stories but they are very good so I highly recommended them and the author is also a very sweet person so go and show them some love.

Lastly thank you SO SO SO much for reading and staying put I love you all and I hope you enjoyed it! Let me know I the comments and I hope you're all healthy and happy - S x