My Hero

Chapter 4

"Where the hell have you been?!" Jean's shout scared the hell out of me.

"Are you crazy?? Don't just jump out of nowhere and shout like this!"

"Don't change the subject! You were gone the whole night."

"Are you my stalker or something??"

"Look here, Desi; don't get on my nerves any more than you already have! Where were you all night? Don't tell me you spent the night with..."

"That's none of your business!"

Most of the cadets forgot about their breakfast and were looking at us curiously. It didn't really help that both of us were screaming.

"Come with me!" Jean pulled on my arm hard and dragged me outside.

"H-hey, let go!"

"Not a chance."

"What the hell is your problem?!"

Jean pushed me against a wall, ignored the small whimper I let out, and slammed one of his hands next to my face.

"You really want to know what my problem is?? You are my problem! Do you have any idea how I felt?! I couldn't sleep at all."

"And why should I care about that?!" Anger was clouding my better judgment, and I wasn't even trying to be careful with my words.

"Why, you ask... I'm very tired, you know... I'm very tired of you and your infatuation with the damn commander. He's more than twice your age, damn it! Do you really miss your father to such an extent that you felt you needed a new one??"

I slapped him hard. "How dare you bring my father into your stupid argument?? It's none of your business what I do or with whom!" He looked at me with what I can only describe as deep hurt. But I can't bring myself to care. He crossed the line big time. "Move, Jean."

"I won't."

"I said, move."

"And I said I won't."

"Don't be an idiot." I was trying hard to hold back from making things worse than they already were, but he wasn't helping me one bit. I let out a deep, frustrated sigh. "What do you want from me, Jean?"

"I want you..." And with that, he closed the distance between us in one swift motion and pressed his lips against mine. I couldn't react for a bit, shocked by his sudden actions. He tried to deepen the kiss, and I could hear a voice in my head scream for him to stop. I tried to push him away, but he refused to let me. So I did the next thing I could think of. I bit his lip hard. I could finally breathe properly, and not sure what to do with what just happened, I willed myself to get the hell away from there. "Why can't it be me?"

"What...?" I stopped and turned my gaze back at him.

"Why can't you look at me once in your life? Is he so much better?"

"Jean, stop this... it's stupid. You are jumping to conclusions."

"Am I really? Are you going to deny you have feelings for him?"

"What I have or don't have isn't what's important. Nothing will ever happen. Nothing happened last night, and nothing will happen tomorrow, the day after tomorrow, or at any point in the future. So, just stop, will you?"

Jean refuses to answer in any way, so I take my leave.

---

"As you all know, the end of your training days will soon come. You will go through a special mission that will determine the top ten graduates. Only they have the privilege to apply to the Military Police Brigade if that is what they would like to do. The rest of you can only choose between joining the Survey Corps and the Garrison. Some of you have shown a great deal of potential, and I can't wait to see what you will accomplish in the near future." Captain Levi was giving us one of his usual speeches, which I would have enjoyed any other day, but I felt horrible. I sensed someone poking my arm and turned around to look at Eren.