All in my head?

Coke and Bleach

I don't know what to do anymore I look in panic for a way out. After scanning the room my sight stops on a bottle of Clorox bleach. I had heard that this stuff is poisonous. I hope it will do the trick. What trick you might ask, take a guess. Is this where my desperation has gotten me. That I don't see any other way out than to ingest a poisonous chemical.  I feel the anxiety start to build once more. Fuck it, I yell grabbing the bottle. as the two substances fiz together. I take my first sip. The taste is horrible and burns quite a bit in my stomach. I Already regret this stupid fucking idea to end my life. Yet I continue to take sip after sip until the sips turn into a gulp. By now the taste in my mouth is so terrible that I can't possibly drink anymore. As soon as the bottle leaves my mouth my vision goes blurry for a brief second. My intestines start to feel like they're on fire. The sensation is quickly fading, while I'm left feeling tired. I now realize how foolish this was so close to mothers day. I stare at the ground ashamed by my desperation.yet when i thought it might kill me I think I smiled for the first time in days. "I need to get a grip on myself before it's too late", I tell myself. I wipe the few remaining tears from my face and pour the remaining mixture down the drain. Now that I have tried once what's going to stop this from becoming worse. I really don't know.