All the Things I Didn't Say

I want to be done

"I just wish I could throw my feelings away"

-
I caught feelings
And I can't throw them back
Being rejected hurts
But the feelings stay still
I like you
And it's not something I can forget

It would be worse if you felt the same
Because then I couldn't stop thinking; about when will it end

I like you a lot
And you like me too
Who will be the first one to forget
And start again
With someone new

Dear Ex,

I like somebody, again. After you broke my heart into a million pieces and watched me drown in my tears. It scares me, a lot. I don't know how to feel. Every bone in my body is telling me to self destruct and ruin it.

I want it to be over. He's not you. He might not hurt me as much as you do. This could be a great new beginning, but I'm broken. I was when you met me, but now I'm even worse.

Please, I beg. I don't want to do it all over again. I want to forget my feelings and fade away into nothingness. To go somewhere else far away from here.

The sad part is I want him to love me, but I'm so scared. It always ends the same. I care about him, and caring about someone is dangerous. You taught me that.

5/20/19