Stupid Love | {Logan Paul Fanfiction}

13

Nillas PoV:
I hated this. Being in this house everyone tells me I once called home, without knowing where I am. Without knowing who all these people exactly are. I was in the bedroom, standing in front of Mavericks cage, just watching him doing what he does. Why do I remember Maverick but I can't seem to get the memories about my boyfriend back. I trust him and myself that the connection I feel is real. I do feel love for him I would just like to get the memories about us back. Somehow all this made me mad, but I stayed in the bedroom most of the time. But in the afternoon my anger rose to a new level. I needed to get this out, so I went straight to the gym. I started punching the bag and I just couldn't stop. I just hate all of this.
I don't know how long I've been doing this but suddenly someone dragged me away from the punching bag. I was sweaty as hell.
"Yo, yo.. easy girl, easy..."it was Jake. I was breathing heavily.
"What are you doing?" I had started crying and noticed how bad my hands were hurting.
"I can't handle this anymore!"I almost screamed.
"Nilla.. Logan is on his way, ok? He's gonna be here soon.. please try to calm down."Jake said while holding me in his arms trying to hold me down.
"Let. Me. Go!"I said meaner than I wanted to. Once I was able to break free I ran to the front of the house, onto the streets and then I just ran. I was exhausted but I couldn't stop running. I was mad at myself and sad for everyone around me. My head hurts like hell and slowly but surely I'm losing my breath. At one point I stopped running and let myself sit down against a wall. I just couldn't deal with all of these memories that I seemingly can't get back. Why would Logan want to be with someone who doesn't even remember him? Why would anyone want to be friends with someone like that?

I was just breathing very heavily, it had started raining and then I saw a car pulling up.
"Jesus Babe.. thank god you're ok.. I was so scared something might've happened to you.."Logan came running over to me and took me in his arms.
I started crying again.
"Hey.. it's ok, babe.. Jake told me what happened.. I can only imagine how bad you might feel but we can get through this, ok? I won't leave you alone. We're in this together.."he said and I believed in every word.
How does he do that? How can he calm me down just like that?
"I'm sorry.. I shouldn't have ran away.."I cried.
"It's ok.. just don't do it again, ok? You don't know yourself here and I don't want you to get lost.."he said and I nodded.
"I just couldn't handle it anymore."I said still crying but calming down more and more.
"It's alright babe, I get it."he said and just held me tight.
"Come on.. let's go home and have you shower.."he said and helped me up on my feet and into the Yeti.
And so we drove home and I had a shower. With my hair still wet I searched for Logan. Downstairs I saw Mark.
"Hey princess.. you doing better?"he asked.
"Did you always call me princess?"I just asked.
"Yeah.. Logan and I lived together for a while and we became friends pretty quickly.."he said.
"I'm sorry.."I said and it felt like those were pretty much all the words coming out of my mouth lately.
"Hey.. it's ok.. weither you get those memories back or not you'll always be my princess.."he said smiling at me which made me smile.
"Do you know where Logan went? I can't find him."
"He's in the gym, working out."Mark said and I went there. When Logan saw me he instantly stopped doing whatever it's called he just did and turned to me.

"Hey.. you okay?"he asked and walked up to me.
"Yeah.. I'm just.. I wanted to say that I really appreciate that you're taking me without all the memories.. that you still decided to be there for me and try to help me to get them back.. but accepting that I might not remember at the same time.. I'm really sorry for putting you through this but I really really appreciate your decisions.."I tried to explain.
"First of all: Stop apologizing, there's no need to, you didn't choose to have that accident! And second: I love you with or without the memories and, as I told you, if they never come back, we'll just make new ones.."he said and took me in his arms.
"Thank you.."I said very quietly.
"For what?"he asked.
"Just.. for being you.."I said. And I kissed him, very softly, very carefully but I meant it.
"Go get that hair of yours dry, ok? I don't want you to get sick."he said softly and smiling.
"Ok... I might be asleep when you're done here.."I said.
"Ok.. goodnight."
"Night.. I love you."
"I love you too."he said smiling brighter than these past few weeks.
I went back upstairs and made myself ready for bed. I was so exhausted I fell asleep almost instantly.