The Dreamer

Austin's Diary

Friday, September 21

I don't think I'm sick, at all. I even took a psychosis test today and it said I have a low to no risk of developing psychosis. I'm in good mental shape, if you can call it that.
So this means that was real. Everything that happened on Wednesday was real. I won't bother telling anything to anyone, not even Chris or Tobias, cuz they'll just think I'm crazy, which, I'm a 100% sure I'm not.

I've thought the whole thing through, and found a few possible explanations. What happened on Wednesday was pretty mysterious but not inexplicable.
I looked up in Google about it, and it says that if you're too stressed about something (which I was, given what happened on Monday) your brain might go wack for a moment and send conflicting impulses. You might also experience similar stuff if you're schizophrenic, or have a schizoid personality. I'm pretty sure I have none. So I'm left with the first option. I experienced all that stuff under extreme stress.
And there's a way I could relieve this stress and prevent something like this from happening in the future.
And that is – to talk it out. With Daisy.

So that's exactly what I did today.

At first I was thinking if I should just tell her everything that happened that day and ask her bluntly why she did it and what she wanted. But then I decided I wouldn't do that. Cuz that'd just make her mad, more than she already was, and then she probably wouldn't tell me anything.

So I decided to ease her into the conversation. After class, when she headed home, I followed at her heels. When we were at a considerable distance from school, well away from her infamous squad, I walked up to her.

"Hey", I said , walking beside her.
"Hey". She didn't seem startled. "How're you doing, stalker?" she asked.
Now it was my turn to be startled. But I stayed calm. I already knew that she knew, cuz otherwise she'd not have come looking for me. To kill me.
"Ah, good, I guess," I replied.
"So let's just get straight to the point. Why have you been stalking me?"
I tried to avoid the question. "Let's get some boba at the deli over yonder. We can talk there."
"No, I'm not getting boba, I'm not going anywhere & we're gonna finish this whole conversation right here and right now," she said sternly.
I had no choice but to explain.
"Well, first off, you seemed really different to me, and I was curious about you from the start. Like, everyone around me seems to be under your spell. You literally got them in your control. How many people in the world have the power to control and influence others? You're like the trendsetter at school. The queen bee. And the fact that you live all by yourself in that huge mansion of yours is queer, ridiculous even. Your house is quite far from Hidden Oaks, where most of us at school live. That neighborhood of yours is now isolated, deserted. Living all alone out there doesn't seem like a good choice to me, especially not for a young and beautiful girl like you."
"Are you tryna flatter me?" Daisy asked, one eyebrow arched.
"No, I'm not. I'm just stating the facts. You are beautiful, and that's a fact. Now, I'm more than glad to help a damsel in distress, but only if she accepts it."
"I don't need anyone's help," Daisy said, curtly.
"I know you don't. You're pretty strong yourself. But imagine, what if someone breaks into your house and tries to kill you? Then you'd be too panicked to fight, and have nowhere to flee. Something like that happened to me a couple of days ago."
She stopped abruptly with a start.
"W-what? What d-did you say?" She stammered.
"I said someone tried to break into my house at midnight a couple of days ago," I said, calmly.
She stared at me. I tried to read her facial expressions. In it, I saw shock, panic, fear, disgust, anger, anguish – all at once.
For a moment I thought she was going to run. Make a run for it, as fast as she could, and lock herself in her mansion. Or she could try to kill me.
I felt a shiver run down my spine. What if she killed me right then and there? She's pretty strong, so she could, like, choke me to death or something. Maybe she'd punch me in the face?
But thank goodness, she did none of those. Instead, she collected herself, composed herself and looked me in the eye.
"Listen, boy," she said, sternly this time, "If I ever catch you stalking me again, I swear I'm gonna fill your guts with lead."
"You won't ever see me again," I replied.
"What do you mean?" She asked, with some alarm.
"I meant that you won't ever see me stalking you again."
"Oh. Good. And listen. Don't ever try to mess with me. I'm tough, you know." Then she showed me her biceps and patted on them.
I laughed a little, but I do have to admit they were very toned and defined.
"Why you laughin?" She snapped.
"Um. Nevermind. I'm just a bit socially awkward, you know."
"Oh." She seemed to understand.
"So, you work out a lot?"
"Oh you have no idea," she replied, with an air of arrogance.
"Well I used to work out a lot too. Once," said I.
"Really?" She seemed interested.
I had successfully captured her attention.
"Yeah... I'd work out for hours on end, no pauses in between. And o never had cheat days or cheat meals. Those were my pet peeves," I said.

"Why did you stop?"

"Well, for a couple of reasons actually. One is that school got harder and harder every year and it became tough to maintain a stable workout routine. Besides, I couldn't afford a gym membership. I still tried, following along to YouTube videos, but soon lost the motivation."
"Oh."
"Plus, there's another reason for it that I don't usually tell anyone — but I'll tell you since you're also a workout freak like me — which is I kind of don't like working out anymore. I mean I like it but... It's um it's like.. I just, I just don't find that motivation inside me.. I don't know..."

"Yeah, I get it. You don't have to say it."

"You do?"

"Yeah. You started working out because of the bullies at school. Then you slimmed down, became super fit and got your confidence back. But those bullies wouldn't stop at anything. They kept mocking you, saying that you looked terribly skinny. So you just decided to give it up and return to your previous self."

"How'd you know that?!" I asked, totally taken by surprise.

"Well..", she smiled. "I just know. And guess what? I know a lot more about you than you think."
"But how?!" I exclaimed.
"That's none of your business", she said, her face giving nothing away. "Go home now".
Then she started to run. I tried to stop her. "Daisy! Wait!" I called after her. But she didn't look back.

I returned home.

I still haven't been able to make sense of it. How did Daisy come to know about it? I never told anyone how I slimmed down, or why I slimmed down, plus she wasn't even around back when it happened. It's highly unlikely that people are still talking about it. Talking about ME.

Plus why did she say she knows a lot more about me than I think she does? What does she know?

Ah wait.
Why didn't I think of this before?
If I can be stalking her, she could be doing the same to me as well!!
She might've been stalking me on social media, collecting information from there and from my friends.

I need to dig deeper into this.