A GIRL LIKE YOU

20

"Do you wanna talk about it?" Ansh's voice pulled me out of my head.
The sun has set. I'm sure mom and dad would be home by now. My day wedding seems like years ago rather than a few hours. Ansh and I have settled into this comfortable silence. Their is no awkwardness. Just companionship.
After he came back with groceries, we cooked together and ate. We are watching TV right now. He must've sensed I'm not really here.
"No. I don't." I said.
"Kiara..."
I looked at him. "I'm fine Ansh. Don't worry."
"Okay."
We went back to being silent when my train of thought led me to work. Which led me to ask, "What about your job?" I asked abruptly.
"What about it?" He said being confused as hell.
"I have a leave because I was getting married. But what about you?"
"Oh. Its not a problem. I already talked to my boss. I'll work from home. I have my laptop."
"Really? When did you get it?" I asked him.
"I always carry my laptop." He answered. Well, that makes sense.
And that also means that I'll be staying in this place with Ansh all alone for god knows how long.
Oh my god. Thats when it hit me. I was so preoccupied with the thoughts of getting away I didn't think. I am here alone with Ansh. Who is sitting at a touching distance from me. We are watching TV. Oh my god. I can't believe I'm here.
"What?!" He asked me and I realised I was staring at him.
"I was just thinking, about this place." I lied. "You said you had memories. What kind of memories?" I asked. Ansh smiled and I knew I was succesful in deflecting.
I also want to get to know him.
I don't know about tomorrow. I don't care about yesterday. All I know is present. And in present he is here for me. He is my friend. He is helping me. And I want to get to know him.
"Well, you know the typical college hangouts. Making out with girlfriends. Endless parties. Night stays and silly games. So many hours of group study. So many disasters and dramas." His eyes seems like he has drifted off to the memory land.
"Seems like you had a lot of fun in college." I said with a little sad note because I never got to enjoy my college life. Mainly because of how I enjoyed my high schools years, a little too much.
"Oh I did. It's the best time of my life, period. I used to be socially awkward when I was a teenager. But college days gave me my personality."
"I can't imagine you being socially awkward." I seriously can't. He seems so confident. His personality and his physique demands attention. He has an aura. He always turns heads and he just can't be ignored.
"Yeah but I was." He chuckled. Then he added, "this apartment was named cherry popper."
"What does that mean?" I found myself asking and chuckling.
"You know, popping the cherry."
"Oh my god!" I started laughing. He made me laugh, after the shitty day I've been through. More like a shitty life.
"Yeah. Mostly guys stayed at the dorms and I had a spare room, so..."
"So you lent it to them for having sex?!"
"Yeah well. They were mostly virgins and I wanted to help them."
"Virginity is not a disease but that's nice of you." I said. He nodded understanding my point of view.
He is a helper. He always wants to help. Then my mind registered the different topic.
I can't believe I'm talking about sex with him. Oh wait. I am discussing virginity. Definitely not wanna remember my cherry popping.
And then I looked at him in shock. "Oh my god, please tell me you changed the mattresses."
He began laughing uncontrollably. "I was thinking when you were going to ask that?" His voice even more rich with the humour. More sexy and soothing.
I swatted at his arms playfully. "Don't laugh. Please tell me. I am going to gross out."
"Relax. That bed broke down. I bought a new one last year."
"I don't even want to know how it broke down." I seriously don't. Keep your sexcapades to yourself, Ansh. Because there's a point when I might jump you and ask you to do all those things to me.
Don't think like that Kiara. He is your friend. Friend. Lol.
I don't want him to be my friend. But it's not like I can ask him to be anything more than that, at this point. It could get ugly. I shook my thoughts away.
He started laughing again which made me laugh. I really like his smile. No scratch that. I love it. It lights up his whole face. I feel happy that my reaction is making him laugh.
"I won't tell you. But I didn't change the mattresses." He winked. I winced.
"Its in the room I'm staying. So you don't have to worry. The room you're staying was mine and I didn't use it that way."
I wanted to ask him about his virginity and girlfriends but that would be so personal. So I talked about the obvious.
"Eww. You could catch a STD."
"I changed the sheets. Besides, its not like I am going to get naked and rub myself on those mattresses."
The image of him naked came to my mind and my cheeks flushed. He noticed it and a really shy smile overtook his face.
"I can't believe I just said that." He said.
"Me either."
And then we burst into laughter again.
After the laughing stopped, I asked, "So you lived here alone. What about Aarav?"
"Oh Aarav wanted to live in the dorms. Since the girl's dorm was not that far and he had to see Meera." Ansh said.
I grimaced. I couldn't help but. Ansh noticed my reaction. "I'm sorry. I didn't..."
"Relax. Ansh. I don't care if you talk about Aarav or Meera. I really didn't have any feelings for him. Its just, I blame him for today, a little bit."
"He is to blame." Then he added. "You really didn't have any feelings for him?"
"It would probably made me sound like a bitch, but to be honest Aarav and I had no connection. None whatsoever. I am relieved that we didn't get married."
"Really? Then why were you getting married to him in the first place?"
"Its not fair to your friend I know. I thought I would probably fall in love with him somewhere down the road. I thought I am not good enough to find someone and Aarav is the best I'll ever get. I carry a lot of insecurities and one of those is being a disappointment to my parents since forever. So I was doing it for them"
I just put myself out there for him. Just like that. It was so easy to tell him that.
"Oh."
"I think Aarav did the right thing. Even though I hate him for it."
"He is going to get his heart broken."
"Well hope for the best."
"Yeah."
After a few minutes of silence Ansh stared at me.
"What are the insecurities and why do you have them. I mean look at you." He said as he ran his eyes all over my body which made me squirm.
"What do you mean?"
"You are so pretty kiara. So beautiful. You literally turn heads. You are intelligent. You are self dependent. You have a sense of humour. You have so many qualities. You are the complete package. I don't see how someone can't want you."
Nobody has ever said that to me. I wonder how our conversation took such a serious turn.
"Yeah well look at your friend. He didn't want me"
"Its not about you and you know it. He thinks he is in love with meera."
"Whatever. Ansh. Nobody sees me the way you see me. Nobody likes a girl like me."
"A girl like you?"
"Yeah a girl like me." Before he could ask anything else I added, "I am going to bed."
"Okay." The expression on his face made me say what I said next.
" I'll probably tell you everything someday. Its complicated."
Because I want to tell you Ansh. You're understanding and you wouldn't judge. I want to tell you everything.
I just don't wanna unload right now. Its been one hell of a emotional day as it is.
"I'll wait."
Of course you will. Cause you're a gentlemen. Your mom must be a queen Ansh.

...