A GIRL LIKE YOU

56

One day. One day? I already found that guy Aarav. He is your best friend. But he hasn't told you yet. And he is ignoring me. Ughh.
"Its fine Aarav. Its all in the best. I'm at a better place now." I finally said to him.
"Yeah. Ansh told me how he took you away for a week and then you came back. And your parents finally listened to you amd understood you. I'm glad for you Kiara."

So I get it. Ansh has basically told Aarav everything. Except everything about Ansh and mine relationship. Aarav thinks that we are friends. Ansh helped me get out of the wedding. Ansh helped me get my new apartment. Wow Ansh well played.
I don't want this to hurt me because a part of me understands why Ansh did this. He doesn't want to hurt Aarav. But another part of me can't help but think that Ansh haven't told Aarav about our relationship because he thinks that Aarav wouldn't like it. And if Aarav wouldn't like it then he'll have to choose. Me or Aarav. And although he said to me that he doesn't care about anyone and that he wants me no matter what, I highly doubt thats the case now. I don't think he will ruin his friendship for me. I am just a girl and not a great one at that too.
I think that when it'll come to choosing, I'll be his second choice. Like I've always been a second choice. An option. An obligation.
Fuck this. Fuck you Ansh.
"Yeah. I should get going." I said and stood up before I burst into tears. Aarav stood up with me.
"Look Kiara, I just wanted to apologize. I hope we can be friends. I mean you are already friends with Ansh and it wouldn't hurt to be friends with me."
Friends? Yeah, right.
"Look Aarav, I can't even imagine what you're going through right now but-"
"You have no idea."  He cut me off. "As soon as I stepped foot in my parent's home they told me to get lost. I've been hanging at Ansh's parents for two days. I went back to work and people are glaring at me and banishing me. Its only Ansh and Aanya I've got right now by my side. I was thinking about coming to apologise to you eventually. And now that I have, I just want you to lessen this guilt a little bit. Just be my friend, that's all I ask Kiara."
Great. Emotional blackmail me. I hatr this.
"Okay. Friends." I said and offered him my hand to shake. I gave him a small smile and he grinned at me.
Well, at least I'm making peace with one friend.
"Friends." Aarav shook my hand.
"Okay. I really have to go now. I'll see you around." I said and before he could stop me yet again, I was out the door.

***
As soon as I came out of the shower I heard my phone ringing. I am so not in the mood to talk to Aaliyah. She coild be the only person calling me at this time.
I looked at the screen through my swollen eyes at Ansh's name on my screen. So he is calling now. After I've gone through every worst case scenario in my head and cried myself in the shower for half an hour. Now he is calling.
I sighed and picked up the call.
"Hello?" I said into the phone.
"Kiara!"
I sat down at the sound of his voice. I missed him.
"Where have you been Ansh?"
"I've been busy with Aarav. Aarav just- he just came back and told me you were there at his apartment?"
"Yeah. You weren't responding so I went there to check on you and instead ran into him."
"Yeah he told me that he apologised to you and that you were there to talk to me about some problem with your place?"
Well, at least he sounds sheepish.
"Yeah, since you helped me buy my place apparently."
This is not the time for sarcasm.
"Kiara.. I'm- I don't know what to say. I'm sorry. Look its just that I don't-"
"Look Ansh..you wanna talk come and see me. I'm not talking to you over the phone."
"But I can't come see you right now. I'm with Aarav."
"Fine. Then come see me whenever you're free."
"Kiara, please. Just listen to me for a second. Its not that easy. Aarav might seem all happy go lucky but I know he is hurt right now. I can't tell him about us. I don't wanna lie to him anymorr than I've already done. So please give me a week. I'll come see you as soon as I tell him everything."
So he is worried about Aarav's feeling and not mine. He can't see that he is hurting me by putting me second like that. He can't see that he is waking up all those insecurities that he helped me put to sleep only days go. He can't see that how wrong it is that he is hiding me like a STD.
"Fine. Good night." I managed to say the two words and hung up before tears fell down my cheeks.
Well,Kiara? You thought you could have a happy ending? Your guy isn't sticking around now. How he'll stick around by your side when the whole world says shit about you? Which they will. Sooner or later.

***
The next week was like a blur. I spent most of my time at home. Decorating the place. Or hanging out with Aaliyah. I did not once texted or called Ansh. It was hard. I checked my phone every hour like crazy and ran to the door whenever the doorbell rang but I did not reach out to him. He needed time so I gave him that. Beside, I was hurt and mad at him. I wanted him to figure that out himself and come to me. Even though it seemed impossible by the time  sunday rolled down.
I went about my routine, but my patience was hanging on by a very thin thread. I either wanted to go and slap Ansh and curse him to death or I just wanted to beg him to be with me.
I was angry. I was hurt. My head kept screaming that he dropped me like a bad habit and that he is not coming back.

...