Still Dark, Love (Still Series #1)

Hakbang 33

Masyadong mabilis ang panahon lalo na kapag masaya ka. Nag-umpisa akong pumasok sa eskwelahan. I had to go to school everyday after work. And then I will go straight to the hospital after school. And then we'll go home and rest. Tapos ganoon ulit kinabukasan.

Ayos naman noong una. I feel so responsible and independent. It was freeing and liberating for me. I was happy...

Was.

Because I am starting to get tired, too.

I was happy on the first months of my daily routine. I was happy working at the cafe. I enjoyed going to school. I enjoyed that.

I am just not sure... if I am still enjoying it.

Ang unang sweldo na nakuha ko sa pagtatrabaho ay hinati ko para sa baon ko at mga kailangan sa apartment.

Riordan told me to keep it but I refused to do that. He wants to pay the bills but I didn't let him do that. We fought. A little bit. Pero sa huli, naging maayos at napunta kami sa pagdedesisyon na hatiin ang mga bayarin dito sa bahay. Hati kami sa bayarin dahil kaming dalawa naman ang gumagamit.

Mayroon naman akong ipon pero nangako ako sa sarili kong para iyon sa mga posibleng gastusin sa school at hindi ako kukuha roon lalo na kung hindi naman kailangan. I am trying to discipline myself and cut down my expenses. Kaya ang una kong sweldo, napunta naman sa maayos.

I was so thrilled that I did that. I was happy that I am now living the independent life I've always wanted.

Then... my first day of school came.

I was happy then, too.

Kasama ko si Riordan mamili ng mga gamit ko para sa school. Ang ibang bagay, siya pa talaga ang pumili. Kaya naman excited akong gamitin ang lahat ng iyon.

I took up business. Walang sinabi sila Mommy at Daddy kung ano ang gusto nilang kurso para sa akin. They let me decide on my own. Nga lang, naisip ko na kailangan ko ang kursong ito lalo na at ako ang magmamana ng kompanyang pinalago nila. It is only right for me to take this course.

Also, it's my way of giving back.

Excited ako noong unang araw ng pasukan. Hinatid ako ni Riordan sa school at nangakong susunduin ako pagkatapos. Gabi kasi ang uwi ko at hindi niya kayang hayaan ako umuwing mag-isa kaya pumayag na rin ako. Kahit pa malapit lang naman ang apartment dito.

"Take care, baby. Good luck on your first day." He said before I got out of the car.

I smiled and mouthed my I love you to him before I turned my back and waved goodbye.

I sighed as I looked at those tall buildings here. I will spent my four years studying here so might as well enjoy it!

Naligaw ako sa unang araw. Masyadong malaki ang school kaya hindi ko mahanap ang clasroom ko. Mabuti na lang at nagtanong ako sa isang group na nakasalubong ko at hinatid naman nila ako. I thanked them.

Wala pa ang prof kaya nakahinga ako nang maluwag. Marami ng tao sa classroom pagdating ko at lahat sila, nakatingin sa akin. I smiled at them but I didn't get any in return.

Hindi ko iyon pinansin at naghanap ng mauupuan. Iyong nasa dulong parte katabi ng bintana ang napili ko. Wala pang nakaupo doon miski sa tabi nito.

I guess I need to break the ice first. They're not comfortable with me yet since I'm new here. Ako rin naman, hindi pa comfortable sakanila.

I tried that day, alright. I tried talking to them.

But I failed.

It seems like they didn't like me. No one talked to me and no one even listened when I introduced myself infront of the class. And they all looked at me like I'm an outcast. Like I didn't belong there.