My Girl ☹︎ Billie eilish

Chapter 16 ☹︎

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The interview was great, up until the point where they questioned me about Billie. They stood behind the cameras, eyes staring at me so hard I could feel them going through my skin.

The words pierced my heart, I didn't want this to be about Billie, I wanted this to be about me. Then again, it's "what the people want" as they said when the camera wasn't rolling.

They're right, I should have expected it, shes famous, I'm in the spotlight. We were together, and people know that. What they don't know is why we aren't now, and that's what everyone wants to know.

I guess that's just the stupid in me, I knew deep down me and Billie wouldn't work. We were children, god I'm still not an adult, but I'm not a kid anymore. Plus she was always in the spotlight, which would cause problems because every straight teenage girl was gawking over her, and attacking anyone who even breathed near her.

Thank god the gay girls aren't actually like that.

Did I learn my lesson? No, my stupid self went and dated my therapist, good idea? No. Did I go on with it though because I was stupid? Yes.

I stepped out my car, my body basically peeling off the black leather seating. I make a run for the door, my feet aching with every step. My heels screaming from beneath me to give them a break.

I make it into my cool air conditioned house. Damn I'm glad I have central air.

I kick off my heels, strip my body of my right sweaty dress, and head for the bathroom down the hall.

My feel hurt so bad that I can't even walk up the stairs, I'm not even going to try. Billie seems to be gone by now. The blanket and pillow are stacked nicely, as if no one was ever there.

Sometimes I miss her.

I miss the way she use to wanna do my hair at random times, even though she barely knows how to braid. I'd tell her it was beautiful, and she'd give me a big kiss on the forehead.

Or when I was to tired to do anything, and I slept in my bed for days, she'd wash my hair for me, sometimes my body if it got that bad.

I wish things never ended.

When I first told nay about me and Billie, she told me truthfully that she thought maybe I had been a little overboard with saying "I'd never forgive her or be friends with her".

Then I told her about how she did it, when she did it, and why she did it. She understood why I had been so upset.

My friends always question, why I won't be friends with Billie. At first I didn't know, I didn't know why I couldn't be around her. I seen her in pictures, and I was fine. But the thought of being around her, made me want to drop to my knees and turn to dust.

That night in the cafe I understood why. I was still in love with her. Everything came flooding back at once, everything we had ever done together. The small things.

I'm still in love with her. Seeing her earlier, and not being able to even give her a hug, afraid I would break down in tears. Made my heart break.

I just want to love her.

I walked into the hallway, turning my head I looked to the right. Shit. I almost forgot my towel.

I walk into my room, I scream when I see Billie sitting on my bed, Phone in her hand. She sees me, her eyes getting wider.

I know what she's looking at, she's not looking at my body, or my face. She's looking at it.

"Billie, what the fuck!" I screech. My face burns, my throat feels thick, my words feel heavy.

"Shit I'm sorry! I was waiting for you- I-" she stutters, her blue eyes now reside on my burning face, my eyes dripping with tears.

"Get out" I croak. My voice barely audible. My throat feels like it's about to close.

I can feel his hands all over me, I can feel it all over again. No. No. No.

Make him stop.

Someone help me.

Make him stop.

Please.

——

Guess who's back