More Than Survive; Tyrus/Ambi

Chapter 21

A/N there are only like 3 chapters left :( (but thats also good cause then I will start my next one)

Amber

I walk into the spoon right after school, my uniform wrapped neatly around my arm. The familiar chime sends a waking signal through me, like I wasn't fully aware of what I was doing. But I do now.

Monika's head turns immediately, like she knows I'm here. I don't copy her smile.

"Amber!" Monika exclaims, she goes to hug me after putting her tray of dirty dishes, I put my hand up.

"Just like that?" I say and Monika looks at me confused, I elaborate. "Just like that your going to forget everything I told you? Monika-"

She cuts me off, "can we talk about this in private?" And I have to nod because there is nothing else I can do, she has to understand. I follow her out of the Spoon and into the parking lot out the back.

"Monika, I told you. We had to break up."

"But why?" Monika asks reaching for my hand, "I love you."

I pull my hands away, "Monika, you're just not my person, and as much as I see you care, you care too much, I can't..." Dammit, I practiced this speech a million times in my head, why can't I do it know?

"So you're just going to dump me, just because I have emotions?" Monika's voice grows louder. I put my hands up, "You don't have to say it like that, Monika we just don't click."

"Another word to say you found someone else, you have haven't you?" Monika points at me.

"That doesn't matter-"

"I knew it! Amber how could you?"

"It wasn't my fault! We just weren't meant for each other!" I yell, then take a step back to see this mess of an argument. "This Monika, this is why, look around you, we both deserve so much better, and I get we will probably not be friends, I just need you to see this."

Monika turns away and looks to the sky, squinting at the sun. "This makes me sick, what are you going to do after you graduate? Andi still has a year to go, and where are you going to go if your parents don't even except you?"

Her voice spirals into vicious thoughts in my mind. What am I going to do? I don't even bother to think about how Monika knows all of this.

"Forget this." I say finally, "Look Monika I'm sorry, I'll see you around okay?"

Monika goes to turn back inside her fingers hesitate on the door, "I'll still love you, I don't care how possessive or disgusting that is for me or you." The she walks back inside.

I don't know how to feel about any of this.

-

-

"Hey how did it go?" Andi says over the phone. It's past curfew so we can't see each other in person, sometimes I am envious of the others who are close to their significant others. That brings back all of the thoughts. My graduation, my parents, Andi.

"Amber?" I must have gone silent for to long. I roll on my back, "yeah, I'm here, it was fine."

"Amber what's wrong?" I hear her voice softly and I long to touch her, to feel a connection other than a phone, something, anything.

"It's just.... Andi, what is going to happen to us when I go off and graduate, I don't even have a place to go! My parents don't give two cents about me, literally, and I don't have enough money now that I quit my job. Why can't we be like everyone else and be in the same grade?" My eyes pinprick with tears.

"Ambs, are you really upset over this?" Andi says quietly. I don't respond, if I respond I'll start crying.

"Hey, hey, It'll be okay." Andi seems to sense this, "We'll work it out, I promise okay, now go get some sleep angel, I love you."

I sniff, "I love you too Andi."

"I know," Is her response before we sign off and I pull the covers over my face.

It'll be okay, It'll be okay, It'll be okay. Is what I repeat to myself over and over until I drift off.

A/N short chapter I know, don't worry the next few will be longer :)

You look breathtaking, how, how am I so lucky to know you?