Kuoh. A small town that secretly belongs to devils. Well...used to that is. Now a "certain organization" is setting up shop and You are the head of it. How will the devils and other beings take this? The answer is... Who cares!! Wanna know why? Beca...
The scene opens up with the author walking out to the audience while holding a case file.
Author: *facing the audience* Hello there, and welcome to a segment called Criminal Records. For today's segment I'll be showing you the record of a former criminal known as Y/N Hellsing.
An image of Y/N then appeared on the screen (imagine the picture from Intro pt.1).
Y/N Hellsing aka Y/N L/N aka Crimson Fucker J.R.
Author: We'll be going through some of Y/N's recent and old crimes that he has committed, so without a further do, let's get started.
1- PROPERTY DAMAGE
Author: Mr. L/N has caused so far a total amount of 559,246,897,321 dollars in property damage. Some due to streets and buildings, some due to vehicles, but a lot due to destroying food stands/carts to be more specific...cabbage carts.
A video then played of Y/N throwing Cabbages while screaming "YEET!" and the cabbage cart owner crying and yelling "My Cabbages"!
Author: Another time Y/N destroyed a whole shipment of Pineapples.
When he was asked why, Mr. L/N had this to say:
Y/N: I was trying to find SpongeBob!!
Author: There was also the time of Y/N destroying Lord Gremory's antique car
Another video then started to play:
A/N: Imagine Anderson is Michael, Y/N is Franklin and Alucard is Trevor and ignore the ending.
Author: Apparently Y/N and his allies were high on Zaboomashrooms and were going through town. As they were driving through town, Y/N also drove through a Dairy Queen that was owned by Lord Sitiri which was caught on tape.
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A/N: Imagine it's a Dairy Queen
Author: Apparently after that, Y/N and his friends left the car there and had also painted it in goat's blood. Y/N left a note on it, but later on he apologized and said
Y/N: Well at least now there's a drive through.
-2. BREAKING AND ENTERING
Author: Mr. L/N has also broken into a couple of buildings and had trespassed on private property. Now for most cases, it was sneaking into Lord Sitiris's and Lord Gremory's homes to ''talk'' to their daughters. But on other cases Mr. L/N had also broke into a couple of other homes. For instance, once he broke into a pottery maker's home while the man was sleeping and threw and smashed all his pots. When he was questioned later on he said and I quote: I was looking for Rupees!! Of course Mr. L/N was drunk so he made no sense. Another time he also broke into another man's house and took a shit in a litter box...the odd thing about that was the owner did not have a cat. Another time Y/N had broken into a family's back yard and when he was questioned why he replied " It was a Poke Stop and I had to catch the Pikachu there". A forth time, Mr. L/N had driven onto private property owned by a higher up and when he was questioned why he replied " I was there to see the mother fucking Shark eating a cheeseburger". Reports later said that there was a sing in he property that did in fact show a Shark eating a cheeseburger.
