*Jenzie* Beautiful Disaster

Chapter XIV

Chapter 14

TW: suicide, eating disorders, self harm mentioned.

Black Magic

Johnny

Isaak had just flew right into me and I put him in a headlock, Chase and Lucas were on the ground tackling each other and Asher was leaned against the wall watching it all. I look over because suddenly the room goes silent, I release Isaak's head and See her.

Kenz.

She looked beautiful, and that dress, fit her like a glove, exactly how I had imagined. It was a silky light pink dress, it looked elegant at first glance, but as you pay closer attention, there was so much to see. Kenzie's long locks of hair thrown over her shoulder. Thin spaghetti straps sat right on her toned collar bone. The top of her dress outlined her perfect torso, her large breasts followed by her slim waist and her curves. Yet, at the same time she was so petite. The lacing details on the side only accentricated her body. She was hands down, the most beautiful human being I had ever laid eyes on. Not only was she definitely perfect by her looks, but her personality, her humor, everything that made her... her, was better than perfect.

It took me too long to realize how much I really wanted her. But I see it now.

Everyone went outside and Kenzie and I were left alone for a few moments. She stood at the end of the hall as humble as ever, She had no idea just how beautiful she was, and I intended on letting her know.

Kenzie

He stood right in front of me and all I could do was smile. He wore a tight button up with the sleeves rolled up. All it did was make him look older and somehow even hotter than he already was. It molded right around his defined abs followed by his ripped black jeans. I walked closer to him and he just stood and smiled at me.

"Well you clean up very nicely." I say breaking the silence. His hands explore my waist and his warm touch lingers whilst he steps closer. I know what he's going to say. That cheesy grin on his face says it all. Please don't Johnny.

"You-" He begins. 

I stop him before he can finish, I take his hands off of me, despite how calming his touch is, because whatever he thinks I am in this moment, I am not. No matter what I look like. My body is a crime scene, hideous things have happened to me, to my body. "Thank you for the dress." I state before walking outside so he can't say something about me that he is blinded by.

We continued the night as though nothing happened, he was distant, but didn't ask questions, I felt bad for leaving him with no explanation, but it's better this way, even if he blames himself, even if he thinks he did something wrong. I can't imagine what he would think about me if he knew. He'd be disgusted. I am.

Besides, it's not like he could fix me, or help me. He is not my hero, not my enemy, not my saviour, he is just some guy, some perfect, guy, and all I am is a broken girl.

He'd hate the real me, they all would. My strong shell can only hide the ugly disaster underneath if I let it.

But a part of me, want to let it out.

No.

Don't think like that.

You've made it too far.

We made our way back to Johnny's so everyone could get their car and head home. It was Just Johnny and I.

"You staying tonight?" He asked, it was still a little strange between the two of us since earlier, what he must be thinking of me right now... "I had a lot of fun, but I'm going to head home tonight." I grabbed the few things I had and put it in my car. "Thank you Johnny, i really appreciate this, you have no idea." I gave him a huge hug and I heard a sigh from his breath, he held on tight like he didn't want to let go. But he did and I left.