Bad dirty jokes

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Requested by xX-Hastings-Xx

Requested by xX-Hastings-Xx

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Hope you like it, enjoy!

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Chrissy held Y/n's hand, giving it a gentle squeeze as she pulled into her girlfriend's parents driveway. And they got there just in time, cause the snow started to fall and it wasn't lightly. They just hoped it would lighten up before they left, because they both had to be somewhere tomorrow and couldn't really spend the night at her parents house.

Y/n looked over at Chrissy, who gave her a reassuring smile. "Don't worry, everything will be okay. Besides your parents already like me." Y/n chuckles, knowing her girlfriend was right. With a smile, Y/n opened her door and quickly got out into the freezing night air. Shivers and goose bumps attacked her body, causing her to pull her jacket closer to her body.

The two women ran to the front porch, giggling as they brushed snow off of each other. "Ladies." Y/n's mom was already waiting for them, a small smile on her face, before pulling her daughter in for a hug.

"Hi momma." Y/n giggled and kissed her mom's cheek before pulling away.

"Hi dear. Chrissy, how are you darling?"

"I'm good Mrs. Y/l/n. How about you?"

The older woman scoffs when Chrissy calls her by her last name, waving her hand. "Please, call me Elizabeth, Mrs. Y/l/n was my mother-in-law and I like to think I'm not much a bitch like she was."

"Mom!" Y/n squeaks, but she just laughs.

"Well, it's true. But come in, it's freezing and you need to get your dad from the bedroom." Both ladies step into the warm house, hanging their coats up and Y/n immediately going to get her dad as Elizabeth and Chrissy head to the kitchen.

"Would you like something to drink darling?"

"Oh, uh wine please. If you have some." As Y/n's mom gets Chrissy her drink, Y/n comes down with her dad, who's trying his best to look intimidating, but just looks like a grumpy teddy bear instead.

"Daddy, stop." He immediately drops his act, sending Chrissy a smile.

"Darling, a drink?" Y/n shakes her head as her mom hands her girlfriend her wine.

"So, how are you ladies doing? Is my daughter taking good care of you Chrissy?"

"Always Elizabeth. Treats me like a Queen and I treat her the same way. And we're good, we're actually looking for homes right now. My apartment lease is almost up so we decided to look for a house together.

"Many times I had to stop Y/n from being a U-haul lesbian." Chrissy covers her mouth to stop wine from coming out as Y/n squeaks and yells at her mom.

"Well, it's true." Her mom shrugs her shoulders, not seeing the problem. "My nail lady said her daughter has to keep her nails short, do you have to sweetheart?" This time, wine comes out of Chrissy's mouth, coughing as she tries to breathe, looking over at her girlfriend who's deep red and frozen to the ground.

Y/n's dad looks mortified and horrified, turning away and walking out of the kitchen. "Mom, you just can't ask things like that!" She squeals, looking anywhere but at the two people in the kitchen.

"Oh darling stop, your father and I-"

"Oh my god no! Do not go there!" She interrupts, pleading to her mom. Elizabeth rolls her eyes and goes to check the chicken.

Y/n looks over at Chrissy who's almost as red as the wine. "I'm sorry." Y/n mouths. Chrissy, trying to be supportive, gives her a awkward smile and nods.

"So ladies, do you have a cat yet?" Oh, this is gonna be a long night.

So, her mom made the jokes instead of reader because i for the life of me cannot say these jokes to my parents or anyone actually without dying from embarrassment, sorry....

A/n: If anyone sends me a request it will NOT be in this book because it's done! Finally! It'll take a week or so to finally get the shouts out though so be patient. I'll tell you when the new book's out so don't worry. But if anyone wants Coming Back Part 3 to happen, please request because that'll get me the motivation I need to start it. Thank loves!

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