I Didn't Mean to Fall in Love (But I Did)

Frank's Date Was Perfect (Or Was It?)

"I don't know how to make myself out to be anything but hopeless, but I really have no idea how to start conversations with people," Frank says.

"That's alright," Aaron replies, "I'm not that great either."

"Yeah, but you've got such a nice voice, that people probably just get lost in that," Frank says, and then blushes. "I'm sorry. I'm not used to going out on dates or anything."

"Really?" He asks, looking actually surprised, "you're, I mean, I guess you're attractive enough to get a lot of dates."

Frank blushes again, "you too."

He tries not to make eye contact and Frank's face turns even redder, "so why then? Why so few dates? I mean, if you want to tell me."

"Well, I guess, I don't know. I'm so dull. My whole life is just a really depressing series of lusting after someone I can't have," Frank says.

"Straight guy?" He asks, "I think we've all been there if that's the case."

"No. Well... I don't know. He's just him. It's just... have you ever fallen in love with someone you're not supposed to? It's really hard, but it's worse when they don't love you back. This guy, like, he doesn't love me back. He doesn't even give me a second glance. He never has, and I don't know what's worse. I don't know if it's worse to swoon over him knowing he doesn't love me back, or swoon over him and hope that one day maybe he will. It's hard either way."

"I've never been in love with someone I'm not allowed to," Aaron confesses, "I don't normally fall in love with people so willy-nilly, so the development it would take to build up that connection would kind of null the process I'd think."

"It doesn't. If anything, it gets riper. I used to just be sort of silly in love, I could've gotten over it, but puppy love turned to real love so quick I didn't get the chance to rethink falling. It just happened, and it's been dealing with it ever since that has made life so miserable," Frank replies.

"So who is it then? This guy?'

"Oh god, I don't think we know each other that well," Frank says, blushing profusely. He wants to keep his crush on Gerard to himself, and the several dozen people who already know about it.

Aaron smiles, and shrugs like he doesn't really care. Frank lets out a breath, because the last thing he wants is to be pressed about Gerard while he's on a date with someone else, with the intent to get over him. He's not sure that'll be possible, but he's enjoying himself right now.

He wouldn't have picked this restaurant though. Their breadcrumbs probably cost more than a week's worth of food that Frank buys. He's not used to the lavish dining. To be honest, he's never really even been to a restaurant with a table cloth.

He'd have been content ordering pizza and watching reruns of crappy seventies shows. That's what he and Gerard do a lot more than they probably should. It's cozy though. It's comfortable not having to leave the house, with a box of pizza and your best friend. It doesn't take any effort, and there's no pressure on him.

One of the hardest things about being in love with Gerard is obviously the fact that he is Frank's best friend. There's no one in the entire world he trusts more or likes being around than Gerard. Not necessarily in a love kind of way, Frank just enjoys his company. He likes talking to Gerard. He likes making Gerard laugh, and he likes the way that there's never any pressure on him to be perfect or smart or fancy. He's just Frank with Gerard.

This is nice too, Frank decides. It's not really his cup of tea, but he's enjoying himself. Still, it doesn't really seem perfect. There's definitely no sparks at the moment, but maybe he's just getting sidetracked on the fact that this is not Gerard. This is Aaron. Maybe if Gerard brought him to a swanky, upscale restaurant he'd feel different about it. He wouldn't necessarily like that though. With Gerard it's familiar and inexpensive, and that's enough to make it perfect.