Wendy Oneshot

💙💜 In Spring Rain

Yerim loves Seungwan’s hands and the ring on her finger. 

It's diamond; the best money can buy, and Seungwan even complains at first, words like too much, too grand, I don't need anything this special , spilling out. 

Said woman is settled across from Yerim on the dining room table, staring at her hands with both a crease in her brow and a smile on her lips while Yerim stares, stares, stares at the woman who has never stopped being her world. 

The night sky sets the apartment aglow, but Seungwan is shining all on her own.

Yerim hums, appeasing the older girl’s rattled nature, because she knows this is just a stage Seungwan goes through with every decision, so how much more a life-changing one such as marriage .

But it's okay. Because Yerim is here, and she’s never going to leave Seungwan. 

“It's must have cost a fortune, Yerimmie. Look at it!”

“I'm looking at it.”

“It’s fiscally irresponsible to spend so much on an engagement ring!” she complains, and Yerim can't help but laugh.

She shushes the older’s complaints with a wide grin, saying, “You're amazing enough to merit something this expensive.”

Seungwan groans in protest but ends up chuckling anyway. “I suppose one could think that.”

Yerim nods and pats the older’s hands; the one without the ring, because to touch the hard mineral would incite something awful pooling in her gut. Like it was sharp enough to slice her open. “One does think you’re worth it.”

She watches Seungwan’s hands make their way to the younger’s face; feels short fingers tuck her brown hair behind an ear.

Yerim smiles like she isn't breaking inside, bringing a hand up and intertwining their fingers. She wishes they could stay like this until the end of time, but the metal of the ring is cold against her grip. 

It's been years since they've lived together; since that kiss. Five, to be exact. The room Seungwan sleeps in is no longer blue; just a plain white with a bed too big to fit one person, because she spends her nights with—

“I— “

Yerim stares at her with hope; that Seungwan feels the same way, that's she's always felt the same way. Because Yerim has been in love with Seungwan for as long as she can remember.

The younger girl’s heart breaks with a few simple words uttered in the inches between them.

“Yerimmie… I've never seen you that way.”

The silence is almost deafening.

“I'm sorry.”

Something in Yerim’s brain sounds like it's being torn apart, but she doesn't process it. Doesn't process anything.

“Yerimmie… please— “

Yerim doesn't notice that she's felt burned by the touch of hands she's dreamt about, flinching away from soft fingers.

Five years , and Seungwan is still the most gorgeous woman Yerim has ever seen. Five years, and Seungwan still sees her as just a best friend. Five years and it feels like some things might stay the same way forever, when they shouldn't. 

Yerim lets go. 

“You mean everything to her. It's only right that she shows you that through your engagement ring," she says, pulling her hands back while the older girl hides her blushing face. Yerim's eyes are now looking at everything but her, as if that could stop the pain.

Seungwan hums in response as rain starts trickling outside, the room darkening in tune with Yerim’s mood. The older girl lets out a sigh; tired or anxious— Yerim is unsure. It's been a while since she could read Seungwan. 

What am I doing here?  

Yerim gets off the chair and starts to walk around the private space meant for Seungwan and her fiancée.

The living area is littered with things that aren't Seungwan's, and it truly sets Yerim on edge. Everything from the hideous green curtains to the framed photos of two fluffy dogs put her mind on the brink, and she has to look away.

She's not quite certain why she's standing in the apartment the woman she loves shares with the woman who stole her away from Yerim. It's kind of ridiculous, she thinks, how she’d dropped everything to run here because Seungwan sounded like she— 

Needed her. As a friend. Of course. 

She wants to question Seungwan herself why she's asked her to come, but she doesn't know if she wants to hear the answer. 

You're my best friend. I had to tell you first. 

I want to know what you think. 

If I said no—

Instead she watches the older raise one hand as the ring glints mockingly with the last rays of sunlight, Yerim an unwilling audience to how in love the older is with another and all the happiness she brings herSeungwan. 

She wants to be upset at Seungwan, but she stares at a perfect side profile and soft lips and falters. How could she think badly of a woman who was only trying to be happy? 

Some things, like Yerim’s love and fascination with Seungwan, will never change no matter how much she wishes for them to. 

But if it makes Seungwan happy, then, to Yerim, it's enough. 

Yerim loves Seungwan’s hands— and the engagement ring on her finger, even if she is not the one who gave it.

one day I wrote her name upon the strand, 

but came the waves and washed it away; 

again I wrote it with a second hand, 

but came the tide, and made my pains his prey.