What Now

2. Red Solo Cup

"Chug! Chug! Chug! Chug!" 

I groaned as I stuck my fingers in my ears. When I told my roommate Ellie that I was pissed at Sean, she insisted I come with her to the Pheta Thi fraternity party tonight. I declined the first fifteen times she begged me. I was not the college party type. Hell, at twenty-eight, I was at least five years older than these guys. I just wanted to finish school and possibly own my own art studio one day. 

As I stood in a far corner, trying to get away from the noise, I looked around at the college students. I still couldn't believe I was here, finishing school. A year ago, if someone had told me this would be my life now, I probably would have laughed in their face.

Around this time last year, I lost my job, was in the process of losing my apartment, and dealing with some severe depression. Growing up the way I did, there were long lasting effects from it. Then I met Sean. I guess you could say the way we met was a little unorthodox. In my darkest moment, I was standing on a bridge and he happened to be passing by as he was fleeing his own troubled past. 

In his own way that was uniquely Sean, he got me down and took me for coffee. He seemed to realize we were both trying to figure out our places in the world. He invited me to Atlantic City and I had agreed. After that, we went on a cross-country road trip that was both fun and terrifying. We became extremely close and formed a great friendship.

In a way, we both battled and overcame our demons and eventually we saw that our place in this world was beside each other. Not to mention, this road trip led me to find my estranged brother and also I learned that I had a birth mother out there. One who is remarkably kind and sweet. She lives in Portland and I use Sean's plane to fly out and see her sometimes. 

I also used Sean's plane when I wanted to visit my brother. Which, I just got back from last night. I wanted to have dinner tonight with Sean since I hadn't seen him in nearly a week. Unfortunately, he had work to do. It wasn't really the work thing that irritated me. I understood he's been busy ever since he started working for the feds. It was more like...he knew when I was coming home and we sort of already made plans to see each other when I got back. 

So, after a phone call with me being passive aggressive and him being utterly clueless, I am now standing in a frat house supervising my roommate and closest friend while she gets wasted. Sure, I had a red Solo cup in my hand but I wasn't planning on drinking tonight. I hear enough horror stories about partying on college campuses and I wanted to make sure Ellie didn't get roofied. 

I was a little nervous when I made the decision to live on campus. I didn't want to have the responsibility of having my own place again right away. I felt like I wasn't ready for that. What student housing, I helped out in the library on campus which got me a discount for housing. I also had financial aid and the assistance of student loans. It was also a bonus that the rent wasn't very much. 

When I first met Ellie, she was a happy coincidence. Like me, she was an artist. She focused on sculptures while I focused on painting. We hit it off immediately and have gotten along ever since I moved in a month ago.

Which is why, at this very moment, I am at a fraternity party where I definitely don't want to be. I would rather be eating Chinese food at Sean's apartment while we watch old Jim Carrey movies. 

I took a sip of my water as I kept my eyes on Ellie. She was standing next to the keg, chatting up two of the football players. I went to take a step towards her and then I felt a hand drop on my shoulder. 

My instincts from the many self-defense classes I took kicked in and I turned around quickly, kneeing the asshole in the family jewels. The man I successfully injured groaned in pain as he doubled over.