What Now

15. Golden Girls

"Here's your espresso, Mr. Williams."

"Thank you," I replied to the barista as I grabbed my cup and put a twenty in the tip jar. I sniffed the hot steam and sighed. Espresso always tended to do the trick. Especially when I was running on less than four hours of sleep.

I barely slept at all last night. Michael sent me a text after he picked up Lydia from the airport to let me know she got there okay. I told him I would give her her space and resist the urge call her. I would wait until she was ready. That didn't mean I didn't worry about her. She was honestly the most important thing to me. Whenever she wasn't here in the city with me, I still got anxious for her safety. I knew she was with Michael and I trusted him. I just...couldn't help it.

It had been almost seven in the morning by the time I got Michael's text. After receiving it, I somehow managed to get a couple hours of sleep in. Once I woke up, I saw there were no text messages or calls from Lydia and decided to try to get out of the apartment for a while.

I knew focusing on work right now would be an impossibility. There was just too much on my mind. I went for a run when I first got up, which seemed to help a little. Listening to some music while hitting the pavement was definitely relaxing.

I started walking towards the doors of the coffee shop when I heard a familiar female voice.

"Sean?"

I paused and turned my head to the left. Ellie was sitting at a table with her laptop in front of her. I walked towards her with a weak smile. "Hey, Ellie. How are you?"

She glanced away sheepishly. "Uh, I think the better question is, how are you holding up?"

It didn't surprise me that Ellie knew what was going on. After all, she was Lydia's best friend. Pretty much her only friend. They were also roommates and I'm sure Ellie would have panicked if Lydia had disappeared without a word.

I gestured to the empty chair in front of me. "May I?"

"Please do."

I took a sip of my espresso as I sat down at her table. I met her eyes and let out a long breath. "I'm guessing you've spoken to Lydia?"

"A little," Ellie admitted sheepishly. "She didn't tell me much. She did tell me what happened between you two and that she was going to her brother's."

When I nodded my head absently, she asked, "She's a runner, isn't she?"

That was a fucking understatement. Once upon a time, I had to find her in a different state when she ran away. "Yes, she is."

"That has to be frustrating."

I frowned at her statement. "Actually, not really. I mean, of course I worry about her when she does that, but I know what she's been through. She hasn't had an easy life and it's going to take a long time for her to turn it around and break old habits."

The corners of Elie's mouth lifted in a smile. "You really love her. She's lucky to have you."

I scuffed as I ran my hand through my hair. "Sometimes I feel like I don't deserve her. With everything she's been through, she's unbelievably kind. She has an amazingly big heart."

Desperate for a change of subject, I cleared my throat before asking, "So, I heard you had a hot date for Valentine's Day. How did that go?"

Her cheeks heated, which told me it probably went very well. "It was very romantic. From what I can tell, he really does seem like a good guy. I've just been so nervous about dating ever since..."

I knew exactly what she was talking about. "Believe me, I understand. I still don't even like to drink unless I'm at home with Lydia."

She laughed as she leaned back in her chair. "Can I ask you something?"