So Many Things I Want To Say

Chapter 5

Hardin

Last week: "Hey, mom I'm on my way home. Tessa called and said she would like me home for Christmas this year."

"Weren't you going to celebrate with Tessa there, and isn’t it early?" I roll my eyes.

"She said it wouldn't be fair to you or her family that we weren't home, and I think it would be easier to come home now I don’t have classes this week." She aggravates me. "I'll see you soon mom."

I get myself dressed, Molly left and I'm glad she did I didn't want to hear her annoying voice anymore.

Walking out to the car it was very cold. It the weather report it said it was going to snow, hope I don't get stuck in it. 

I turn the key a few times the car stalled at first, but eventually started. Must be the weather change. Snow started to fall thick, the sky got dark. FUCK, I took it slow there were drivers swerving all over the highway.

I was an hour from home the traffic was horrid, I was driving through a green light, when I turned to my left then...

Feeling Molly around me doesn't give me much pleasure as it use to... At first it was a rush of adrenaline but now it's just a fuck and leave.

She has a thing for me I know she does she always comes back for more. Her movements bore me... I decided to think of the one girl I want most in this world to be around my cock.

I see her perfect blonde hair in-between my fingers as I tug gently. Her smile, her moans, she moaning my name.

"Tessa." I moan out loud. I open my eyes as I cum in the condom and I see Molly glare at me.

"The fuck Hardin?" I laugh.

"Oh you know you don't care." I stand up and grab my phone to call Tessa. She finally answers.

"Look, Tessa I would really like it if you came here." She sighed on the other line. Why is this so hard? I just want her to be here with me. Alone.

"Hardin, to be without our families on Christmas isn't Christmas." She kept going and going. She is lucky I love her.

"Fine Tessa, I'll see you next week." She really doesn't understand.

"Hardin are you coming back to bed?" Molly whined. Molly is beautiful but she isn't Tessa. I met Molly sometime last year we drank together at parties and had fun together not much happened between us, we fuck that's it.

"Molly, can you just leave please." She stands up with her naked body. The blanket falls clean off her body to the floor.

"Come on Hardin you know you want me, I don't care if you call for her I just want to be the one that gets your attention."  She gives me a smirk. She puts her hand on her boobs.

"I'm not in the mood Molly." I place my phone on my dresser, she comes closer.

"She is never going to give you the time of day. Give me your time and I'll give you mine.” She pouts. Putting her hands on my face. The sheet that is wrapped around my waist falls.

"Kiss me Hardin." She moves in putting her lips on my cheek. I ignore her. She gets angry. "It's always going to be her, never me!" She puts her pants on and grabs her top and walks out. She's fun but I want something more. All I keep thinking about is how Tessa feels, how she moves, her lips on mine... It seems weird everything around me begins to disappear. The walls collapse.  

Everything is black, why can't I move? My body hurts. I hear sirens flashing lights. But everything is a blur.

Tessa! Tessa! I need you! Where are you? I hear her why can't I see her?  I hear her crying, what is going on? My body is stiff I can't feel, I can't see. What is happening? I'm scared. It's quite now, why can't I see? I feel a hand touch me I hear crying, It's Tessa. Tessa! When I scream nothing happens. Where am I? I see something, the dark starts to diminish.

"Hardin. There you are." Tessa runs to me. I look around and see that we are in a park it's summer. "Hardin, I was looking everywhere for you." Tessa is young her little voice sounds so innocent. She takes my hand and makes me run with her.

I remember this day it's Tessa's birthday. I see her mother and my mom sitting at a picnic table, no one showed up to her tenth birthday I was the only Landon and I there. Landon stood by the tree near the table.

She begins to run again away from me.

“You are running fast.” I couldn’t keep up. My heart rate sped up but my body slowed down. “Tessa, I can’t breathe, Tessa slow down!" My voice it sounds like a little boy. She turns around with her big smile with her two top teeth gone.

"You alright Hardin?" As she turned around she held me in her arms.

"I'm fine just a little tired." I try to walk with Tessa, she takes my hand, turns to me and smiles, but she runs off and starts to disappear, I want to run after her the sky is getting dark. Tessa is gone. What is happening? My body is on the ground what I think is the ground. Is this all a dream? Tessa? I want to yell her name. Will she hear me?