Scarred

Chapter 17

Eva's POV
He's barely holding onto the edge. He won't be able to hold on for much longer.

"Cas!" I scream, "Cas grab my hand!"
"No, Eva get back. The edge will just continue to crumble if too much weight is on it, I'll grab him, you get back," Apollo argues.

Please. Not now. Don't get on my nerves now. If we mess up and Cas falls, not only will he - someone who means so much to both of us - will die, I'll join him.

"But-"

"Eva! Please, listen to him. I trust him, you may not but I do!" Cas interrupts, roaring flames in his eyes. Reluctantly, I stumble back, holding onto Cassie's arm as I wait in anticipation. She senses my fear and goes to take my hand, but before her fingers can even wrap around it, I watch the rock Cas is clinging onto break away.

"Cas!"

I should've just grabbed him. I shouldn't have listened to Apollo, I should've saved him.

Except when I look down, there he is, being carried up by a much larger dragon than what he can turn into. Frantically, I look around and realise Apollo's gone. I shouldn't be surprised by the fact that he can turn into a dragon, he's Cas' brother after all, but it's not what I was expecting.

Slowly, he places Cas back on the floor beside me, and my friend gives me a small smile. One just for me.

"See, I'm okay. I told you I trusted him."

But his smile doesn't meet his eyes. His eyes are angry.

And instead of returning the smile, I scoff before I can even stop myself.

No.

Now's not the time for this. For the jealousy to be coming back. I thought I was over it, I thought I would be fine from this point onwards, but seeing Cas so willingly put both of our lives in Apollo's hands, it shakes me to the core.

"Eva..." he mutters, the anger - the flames - in his eyes immediately going out.

Biting my lip, I stand up and turn away, beginning to walk out of the room. He has no choice but to follow.

"Eva, what's going on? Are you okay?"

Only when we're far away from the rest of the group does he ask the question. And I tense up at it. Fists clenched, muscles stiff, my movements seeming unnatural. He grabs my wrist, and once again I'm reminded of the Silence. But when I try to pull away, he doesn't let me.

His touch is usually so comforting. So why does it make me want to cry right now?

"Eva!"

"Do you really think I'm okay?! I know you can trust that brother of yours, but so far I've been unable to. I don't know what it is about him, maybe it's that he just hates me - which he is allowed to - but something about him makes me anxious! So seeing you put your life... our lives... into his hands like that clearly isn't sitting well with me," I snap.
"So that's what this is about? Jealousy?" He replies, letting go of my wrist.

No. I don't want to admit that this is exactly what I'm feeling. I don't want to let him know I'm getting mad over something so petty.

"No, it's about me being concerned about my safety." Whilst it's partially true, it's mostly a lie. Yes I was worried that I might die, but I didn't, so I couldn't care less about it now. It's exactly what Cas said was the problem: my damned jealousy.

And then there's another thing.

"Really? Is that really the problem? You've never given a damn about your own safety before, you used to throw yourself into danger without a second thought before you found out that the curse would put me in danger too. You're lying to me Eva. You're keeping secrets from me. We promised not to keep secrets."