Chicago Fire imagines

It Should Have Been Me

Requested by Corebore123. I hope you like it. Thanks for requesting ❤

"You're late". Casey yelled at you as soon as you stepped foot in the room.

"Can you shut up". You groaned rubbing your head.

"You're drunk". He scoffed.

"I'm not drunk, I'm hungover. Now please shut up and leave me alone". Groaning as you went to walk away but he stopped you.

"Y/N, I know you have gone through a lot lately but you're going to lose your job if you dont straighten up".

"I'll do you a better one. I quit". You huffed, walking out of the station and going to straight to your new favorite place. The bar.

Five shots of tequila down, a thousand more to go and it was only ten am. The bartender knew you name by now and what you wanted. You had been there the night before and maybe hooked up with two guys in the bathroom. You didn't remember much just you had a good time and wishing that it didn't end. Because not you felt like shit.

"Another". You hissed as the fire liquid dripped down your throat.

"I think I should cut you off. You were just here seven hours ago and now you're back again. You need to take a break. Get some coffee in you".

"What I need is a bartender that minds his own business and pours me another shot".

"I'm calling you a cab".

"Don't bother". You grabbed your keys and wobbled out the door. The bartender ran after you and snatched your keys away.

"Give them back now. Or I'm calling the cops". You struggled trying to reach them.

"And tell them what? I tried to stop you from driving drunk. If you don't want me to call a taxi then call someone to pick you up". He said going back inside with your keys. You huffed and dialed Kelly. He was the only one that cared about you.

"Kelly, I'm at a bar and they took my keys. Please come help". You slurred your words as the alcohol was taking effect, the voice mail ended. Kelly didn't pick up so you weren't going back into the bar so you sat in your car.

About a hour later Kelly finally showed up. He walked into the bar and explained to the bartender what was happening to you. He came out with your keys and you didn't even know it. You fell asleep, you didn't get much sleep well at all. Drinking helped but sleep was never a option.

"Y/N"? Kelly knocked on the window, you didn't move. He started to freak, he opened the door and shook you.

"Hey, pal". You woke up giggling.

"What are you doing"? He said breathless.

"I had the best dream". You said with a smile then it turned into a frown as you remembered it and it wasn't real.

"Come on, let's get you out". He was trying to pick you up but you slapped his hands away.

"I'm not going anywhere. I want another drink".

"Hey, you want to go to Mollys"?

"Really? You'll take me"?

"I'll take you, come on". Kelly picked up up bridal style, you snuggled your face into his neck. He held you tight as he brought you to his car. Buckling you up, he moved a piece of hair from your face as you slept. He missed the girl he fell in love with. But he'd do anything for you to be it again. The happier you.

Pulling up to Molly's, you cheered getting out of the car and ran inside  but quickly regretted your decision. All the people in your life were standing face to face with you. Everyone from the station, your friends, even the old lady that lived next you to was there.  You didn't want to deal with this today or ever. Backing up you walked into Kelly, he locked the door and stood guard along with Cruz.

"What do you all want"? You knew the answer before anyone had to say anything.

"What happened"? Kelly asked causing you to chuckle as you held back tears.

"My sister died. That's what happened".

"I know that. I mean what happened to make you not care? Shay wouldn't want this for you".

"It was supposed to me that day". You yell tears running down your face.

"I asked her to take my spot. I should have died instead of her. Then everyone would go on with their lives".

"We would mourn you the same way we have for Shay". Gabby stepped up.

"Really? You had to take two weeks off for her. Me? You'd be back the next day".

"That's not true and you know it".

"You all blame me. I can tell. You all can't even look at me the same. Its not Shays little sister anymore. It's Shays sister that lived. I should have been the one not her".

"We dont blame you at all. Its you that is blaming you and you shouldn't. Its not your fault". Kelly came up to you, taking your hands in his.

"I just want her back. I want that day back so I can take her spot and everything would be okay". You sobbed into Kelly's chest.

"You think everything would be okay? Shay would probably be in the same place you are right now. I would be devastated if something happened to you".

"Shay wouldn't want to see you like this. She would want you to mourn but still do your job. She loved doing what she did and she would want you to carry on". Kelly held you tight rubbing your back.

"Yeah kid, we need you". Herrmann came and wrapped his arms around you, then Gabby and Joe and Otis. Everytime came in for a group hug.

"I need you". You heard Kelly whisper.

"I'll get help, for all of you. I'll try and get back to myself that I once was".

"That's all we're asking. We want you to be happy and not have this reckless life".

After some talking with the crew, you decided to see a therapist about your guilt you were feeling and the reckless behavior. Kelly kept a close eye on you. His feelings grew and grew for you as you progressed into the person you wanted. You grew even fodder for him as well. Only time will tell.