𝐭𝐡𝐞 𝐫𝐮𝐬𝐡.

𝐫𝐞𝐚𝐝𝐲 𝐭𝐨 𝐠𝐨 | 𝐞 & 𝐫

R

    Richie always felt like his brain was different sometimes. It was like spilling soda on a keyboard - not only was the keyboard fried and short circuiting, once the power was gone, the keys had a sticky residue on it, making it slower, soon rendering it useless and beyond repair. He felt like an idiot most of time, and he believed he had nothing to show to disprove this point. It was hard for him to pick up on social cues, like when to shut up, but then, there were those days - the days where he was hyper aware of his surroundings, and where he was extremely paranoid. Today was a mix of those two days.

    As he walked into Richie's bedroom, he looked at the Polaroid again, and sighed. Eddie must have not noticed him in his room, because he jumped when Richie spoke. "Who is this?" Richie said, un-taping the photo from the box on the shelf. "God..." Eddie muttered. "It's just a friend." He said, snatching the picture from Richie and putting it inside the box. Eddie put the box back on the shelf, struggling a bit because of him being shorter than the other boy. "Right. Just a friend that you're hugging veryyy tightly in this picture." Richie said, stretching out the "very" as he sat in Eddie's chair at his white desk. "Cut it out Richie, jesus... Not everyone has it out for you." Brutal, yes. But honest? Absolutely.  "Just asking." He said, trying to mask his jealousy under a facade of curiosity. "Right." Eddie said, fixing his hair in the mirror. Richie stared at the boy, glancing at himself in the mirror. He'd never really known Eddie to be so vain, but he also hadn't known him to be so cold-hearted before. I guess a lot changed.

E

    Eddie finished packing, zipping his pastel pink suitcase. Richie snickered a bit. "You have a pink suit-" "Don't even think about finishing that sentence, Tozier." Eddie said as he cut him off, sounding unamused. Part of him was excited to leave:  to get a fresh start, spend some time with Richie - but the other half of him was dreading it a bit. He knew Richie would be trying to hit on him the whole time, and Eddie couldn't really control his emotions around him.

R

    "Okay, do you need to go back to your apartment to your apartment to get your clothes?" Eddie asked him. Shit. He did, but at this point he felt tied to Eddie. He didn't want to be away from him. "Yeah, I guess I do." Richie said, sighing a bit. He looked at the boy and his perfect yet delicate features. "Are you gonna go?" Eddie said, confused. "Yeah." He said, snapping out of the trance and grabbing his bag.

E

    When Richie left, Eddie lied down on his bed. He usually didn't lay on his bed before taking a shower, but he was incredibly tired. He didn't know why, he just was. While he basked in the sunlight on his bed, his eyes grew heavy. Before he knew it, he fell asleep.

R

As Richie got back home about thirty minutes later, he looked for Eddie. He found him in his room, lying on his bed. Richie smiled, laughing silently a little. He found Eddie adorable when he slept, but then again, he found him adorable when he did almost anything. He watched as the sun danced on his tan skin, making it have a golden glow. His curly hair looked like dripping coils of honey in the bright light. He had full, dark brown eyelashes that looked like mascara was applied to them, and pink, moisturized lips that drove Richie crazy.

On the other hand, Richie hated his own appearance. He was pale, quite skinny, and too tall for his liking. He had freckles, but they weren't cute like Eddie's. They were scattered on his cheeks and didn't show up too much. His hair was usually a mess. He didn't have soft, delicate features - his were harsh, with a sharp jawline, hollow looking cheeks, and a prominent nose. However, when he looked at Eddie, he felt a million times uglier. Eddie was the most beautiful boy in the world, as far as Richie was concerned.

Hesitantly, Richie walked over to the boy and gently sat on his bed. He tried not to, but he couldn't convince himself not to lay next to Eddie in the sun. Eddie was facing the opposite way. At the risk of sounding like a creep, Richie could smell his hair - a gentle scent of vanilla, almost like a cupcake.  He was about to wrap his arms around Eddie. That was all he wanted to do. However, restraint. He put his arms back. He had to respect Eddie - that he wanted to wait. As hard as it was. He just had to earn his trust back, somehow. Richie gently caressed Eddie's arm to politely wake him up.

E

    Eddie woke up with squinted eyes from the sun shining in his face. He turned to face Richie, not completely processing it was him. He cuddled up next to the mass, his eyes still closed. He could feel himself start to fall asleep again. He heard a voice. "Uh, Eds." Silence. "Eddie." This time, a little louder, and with a shake. Eddie looked up and saw Richie, then flinched, moving away. Richie laughed a little. "Wow, Eddie." He heard him say with disbelief. Eddie was left humiliated - yet again. Was he even surprised at this point. "Sorry, I- I- don't really know what got into me." Eddie said nervously, rushing out of the bed. Richie got up as well. They met, standing at the corner of the bed. Eddie looked up at Richie, and Richie looked down at Eddie. They stared into each other's eyes again, looking at Richie's dark eyes, which were twinkling. It felt like they were trying to send a message. "I..." Eddie said, resting his hand on Richie's chest, wanting to say 'I love you'. What was wrong with him? He was just chewing out Richie for something so miniscule not even an hour ago. Eddie shook his head a bit, his breath support wavering. "...I'm packed." Eddie said, deflecting from saying those simple three words and walking away.

    Richie was right - Eddie was getting far too emotional. And for what reason? After all these years, he'd been devoid of many feelings, and now, they had to come back? When he saw Richie, he felt like every emotion he hadn't felt in a while was poured into a bottle and shaken up. Richie's eyes. His smile. His voice. Everything he'd repressed for so long would come back to him just imagining Richie. However, the love wasn't limitless. Yes, there were things that he didn't like about Richie: he was a sycophantic junkie with a fucked up definition of love. And there was more: Memories Eddie couldn't erase. Things he couldn't unsee. But he felt the pain surrounding on the name 'Richie' start to... fade. To dissipate, slightly. He still needed time, though.

R

    "Thanks...?" Richie said, confused about what that interaction was. So close, yet so far, once again. 'This kid needs fucking help.' Richie thought to himself and sighed. "Are you ready?" Richie said with a puzzled expression, watching Eddie pace around the wooden floors. "Okay. Yeah." Eddie said, letting out a breath. "Alright. We'll take my car, I guess." Richie said, grabbing his heavy bag with a heave. He opened the door for Eddie, once again. This time was different. He was met with a gentle "Thank you." Richie looked surprised that Eddie even acknowledged him. "Wow. Again with the surprises..." Richie muttered.

E

    He saw Richie open the door and sit in the driver's seat. "You can't be serious." Eddie said, squinting his eyes. "You know you're on something right now. You're not driving." Eddie said, walking around to the driver's seat. "Wha-" Before Richie could speak again, Eddie helped him out of the driver's seat. Then Eddie realized something, displaying an oh shit look on his face. "What? What's the problem?" Richie said, looking at him concerned. "I... can't drive. Okay. This is fine." Eddie said, trying to convince himself. "Okay, now you can't be serious," Richie started. "You're fucking sixteen, almost seventeen. You can't drive?" Richie said, with a look of disbelief. "Guess I'm driving anyway." Richie said with a smirk. He got into the driver's seat and shut the door in front of Eddie. Eddie rolled his eyes, walking to the other side into the passenger's seat. "This is insane!" Eddie said, slightly shouting. "Brief reminder, it was your idea. So, just keep that in mind when this goes horribly wrong." Richie said. Eddie was about to insult him, but he didn't feel like fighting right now. This was supposed to be a new chapter of his life. He didn't want to start it in a fight. He leaned back in the seat, observing Richie's car. The leather seats were worn and had small tears in them. There was an empty bottle of whiskey under the passenger's seat. In the cup holders were cigarette butts and two miscellaneous empty bottles of pills. On the dashboard were three pairs of sunglasses and a can of a Monster energy drink. "God, do you ever clean this car?" Eddie said in disgust.

R

    There was that look again. That tone of voice. As soon as Richie felt okay, he felt disgusting yet again. "Are you ready, or should I kick you out of my car before we're too far gone?" Eddie sighed, passing his stuff to the back seat of the car next to Richie's. "Yeah. Sure. Let's go."