𝐭𝐡𝐞 𝐫𝐮𝐬𝐡.

𝐧𝐨𝐢𝐬𝐞 𝐩𝐨𝐥𝐥𝐮𝐭𝐢𝐨𝐧 | 𝐞 & 𝐫

E

    Eddie had gotten quite good at blocking out noises over the years - whether it was his people saying rumors about him behind his back, his mother's lectures, or his own internal monologue and precarious thoughts, he'd become accustomed to such noise pollution. His tactic for tackling his tribulations was simple - block it out. If he didn't hear it, he wouldn't have to face it or deal with it. He could just continue the daily motions of his life. Pretending the problem didn't exist was the simplest solution, but certainly not one of the most practical. Eventually, the problem would build up and swell until ignoring it was no longer a valid option. Despite the repercussions of this tactic, Eddie had become far too used to using it. So when Richie proposed his next question about an hour into the car ride, Eddie wasn't sent in to panic mode, but rather didn't hear the question. "Eddie?"

    Eddie looked up after his name was said a second time. "Yes?" He said, snapping back into actuality from his musing. "I asked you if I could ask you a question." Richie said, repeating his statement. "Oh." Eddie said, this time with a strike of anxiety panging his chest. "Yeah. You know, it's less scary if you just ask the question instead of setting it up." Richie ignored the statement, seeming to be in a contemplative frame of mind. "Why did you lie to me?" He said, looking at Eddie with a curious expression once they arrived at a traffic light. The red light from the stop light flourished Richie's pale skin and coiled his dark hair as Eddie looked at him, almost seeming to be an apprehensive warning for Eddie's next words. "About?" Eddie said, scrambling to think about what he could have lied about this time.

R

    Richie's index finger traced the outline of the steering wheel with pretense. "You know...about being straight." He said, muttering the last part a bit as to not provoke him. The light changed to green, and he started to drive again.

    Contrary to other's belief, Richie actually did pay attention.  He may not have grasped the big picture of things, but there were certain things he did notice - small things, seemingly insignificant things about people. Like when Eddie was telling the truth he'd get nervous and figured it was something that Richie wouldn't like. When Eddie was lying, he'd put up a bold front and get defensive - it was predictable, yes, but it was those defining moments in which he seemed to understand Eddie, and where he wasn't as complicated as he usually tended to be in most cases. He mostly understood why Eddie was so anxious around him, but part of him still didn't completely comprehend it. How could Eddie still be so nervous around him, after all these years? Maybe he wasn't remembering the old days completely - maybe Eddie had always been like this. But something was definitely different. As for Richie's 'truth detector', it applied to Eddie's response. "Who said I was lying?" He said, sounding a bit defensive.

E

    Eddie heard Richie scoff. "Okay, like I said, there's no way to make what we did sound 'straight'." Richie's tone sounded different - it wasn't cocky this time, it sounded genuine. "So again, I ask you - why did you lie to me?" The question wasn't necessarily innocuous, but Eddie took it as so. He let out a deep sigh. "I don't know... I guess I thought you wouldn't want to talk to me anymore, honestly." He said, sounding slightly ashamed. Richie, who accidently stopped the car for a second, looked over to him with a confused stare. Eddie felt as if the already close walls were closing in on him. "Why would you ever-" Richie stopped for a second, and Eddie watched as he thought for the correct words to say. "How could you even think that?" Richie finished. "I mean, just being me is enough to make me think you wouldn't like me anymore. Especially with you saying 'how much I've changed'. I just felt like you wouldn't want to be friends with me as much as you wanted to back then." Eddie said, letting everything he'd been thinking out until the air. Richie didn't respond, seeming to be deep in thought. Eddie lingered in the silence, feeling left behind in the dust of his own words.

R

    Richie, for once, was left without words. What kind of monster did Eddie think he was? God. He knew it was unlikely that anything could make him like Eddie less, let alone something as simple as who he liked. He felt disgusting, imagining how skewed Eddie's perception of both he and himself was. How shitty of a person did Richie come off as? "Richie, can you say something?" Eddie spoke in a quiet manner. "The way you are now - or how you think you are now - is not... gonna make me like you any less. Who you like or what gender you like isn't gonna change my feelings for you." Richie said, stopping himself before he'd push himself into saying something that was too much for the moment. He held the steering wheel rigidly, feeling as if he was holding on for dear life. "Yeah..." Eddie said, trailing off. Richie heard a noise and thought it was Eddie crying, but he was laughing slightly. "What?" Richie said, feeling stupid again. "It's so stupid. I don't know why I thought you'd care about something like that."

E

    Eddie felt another strong rush of emotions pour into his heart. It was something he'd wanted for so long. Acceptance. Validation. Even though it was only from one person, it was from the person who'd grown to be the most important person in his life, even after only two days. Eddie sat back, feeling tension release from his shoulders replaced by butterflies flying away. He didn't know what he was feeling. It was like looking through a kaleidoscope for the first time, seeing all of the vibrant colors and easing your mind. "Yeah, exactly. Fuck all of that." Richie said with a smile and a comforting voice.