Winfred

23

Official Report

British Intelligence

Code: 3986

Kathleen Winfred

Entertainment at the Prison

The prison was beginning to become a very tense place. It was as though some unknown thing had reached down and gripped everyone, making every human in the old hotel more subdued than usual. The guards were silent; they no longer played the radio at the guard station. Pirot was more tight-lipped than usual. Von Steubon, when I saw him, looked as though he had not slept for a few days. 

I began to wish that I had news of the war. Now that it was the new year, I had hopes that the war would begin to wind down, making its way to a resolution. Surely it had gone on long enough. 

I asked Pirot what had everyone so out of sorts. She told me that bombings had increased and, with them, the number of German civilian casualties. This fact alone sobered many. 

I asked her for news of Britain. She said that they also had suffered bombings from the Germans. 

I asked her why Von Steubon seemed so tired. She responded by asking me if I had noticed the reduction of prisoner torture that had begun before Christmas. Thinking back on it, I told her that I had. She said that Von Steubon has been receiving harsh criticism from his superiors for this reduction but has been continuing to go against their wishes. 

She had to leave soon after, as the guards came through the corridor on their routine check. 

Once they were gone, Virginia hissed my name from across the corridor. She told me that she had a plan to lighten everyone's moods and get revenge on the "ultimate heinie"; she just needed Pirot's help.

I wondered what revenge she wanted to enact on Heinrich Schwab, but told her I would speak to Pirot. 

To keep my promise to Virginia, I spoke to Pirot when she came through the next day to distribute meals. 

She went to speak to Virginia soon after and, from what I understood, plans were soon solidified for their bit of mischief. 

No matter how many times I inquired of Virginia as to what her plan was, she refused to tell me. 

So I waited. 

It did not take long to figure out just what she had, with Pirot's help, accomplished.

I was just waking up two mornings after her conference with Pirot, when the door to the entrance of the corridor burst open and Heinrich Schwab stormed down the hallway, holding a container of something.

Only the Heinrich Schwab I knew was blonde. To him, it was a matter of Aryan pride.

This Heinrich Schwab had dark  hair. 

He came to a stop outside of Virginia's cell door and held out the bottle to her, demanding that she admit guilt. 

She told him that he could prove nothing. 

He responded that he could, because there had been a paper taped to the bottom of his shampoo bottle that said "Got ya, heinie!" and she was the only one who said that. 

She asked him if he was really going to go present his case to Von Steubon and admit that, around the prison, he was commonly called a heinie. "Also," she said, "how would I have gotten out?"

He stuttered, somewhat flustered at her words, his face turning tomato red. He grabbed her shirt front and began to yell obscenities at her. I was amazed at how calm she was remaining throughout the entire ordeal.

Schwab was interrupted in his swearing tirade when the door opened and Von Steubon, Pirot, and Schubert entered. 

Von Steubon's demand to know "what was going on in here" was cut off when Schwab turned around and faced the newcomers. Von Steubon immediately went silent, his lips still parted as if to speak and his eyes wide with surprise. Pirot covered her mouth to keep from laughing. Schubert, thinking a stranger had somehow found their way into the prison, suddenly began to bark like mad. 

This noise seemed to shock Von Steubon out of his stupor and he started chuckling at Heinrich's misfortune. Taking Von Steubon's laughter as affirmation, Pirot began to laugh outloud, her shoulders shaking with mirth.

Schwab, thoroughly embarrassed, attempted to make his case to Von Steubon, who eventually stopped laughing long enough to tell Schwab to "get back to his post", ignoring the soldier's protests. 

As he left, Pirot said, loudly enough for him to hear, that "Schwab looked better as a blonde" because his "bald spot was harder to see".

Schubert ran from the room, hot on Schwab's tail, barking madly the entire way.