Oneirataxia: My Fictional Man

CHAPTER 33

Chapter Thirty-three

The door of my office creaked as it closed. Both Mr. Clark and Madam Belen trudged their way outside after they spoke with Benjamin, catching up on some business matters. Madam Belen or--- Madam Chua, as what Benjamin knows, even cracked a joke before they leave.

"You owe me for this woman, Mr. Ben. It's very unusual for a CEO to personally go to someone's office, noh? It's actually my first time to see you here in my office. I guess it only takes love to make you do that," she exclaimed playfully. She then winked at him afterward.

I felt my ears burning from the last phrase she said. She shouldn't have said that! If she's playing along with the current flow of this story, then she's bad at it. Benjamin doesn't love me the way I do. Nakakahiya. She's too exaggerating!

"Are you sure you're okay?" Benjamin perched his cautious eyes on me.

"I really am. I just felt an advanced longing for this company," I answered, faking a smile.

There's an adage that says fake it 'till you make it. How I wish I can make my smile as genuinely as possible.

I told him a while ago that I just got emotional because I only have remaining days to work here since Madam Chua will have her work comeback next week. Looking from his suspicious eyes, it seems like he doesn't buy my alibi.

"Are you sure?"

"Oo nga. Ano ka ba, it's just my premenstrual hormones. Malapit na ata and dalaw ko kaya nagiging emosyonal ako," I lied again. This time, it sounded more sensible and... scientific.

"You can always visit here anytime. Don't worry, I will free my schedule when you stride to come here," pagpapagaang-loob niya.

Ironically, mas lalo lang bumigat ang dibdib ko sa narinig mula sa kanyang bibig.

If only I can visit here anytime I want, Benjamin, if only, but I can't. I wouldn't just long for this company, but also for you. I will surely miss you that it hurts because I couldn't be able to see you after this.

Kahit gaano ko man kagusto na dito na lang ako pero napaka-imposible namang mangyari. Wala akong magagawa dahil nasa loob lang tayo ng isang kuwento na kailangang magtapos. Every story has its own ending, and Oneirataxia is no exception.

Mahal na mahal kita at sobrang bigat sa puso dahil paulit-ulit akong sinasampal ng katotohanang bunga ka lang ng imahinasyon. Hindi ka totoo, at yun ang pinakamasakit.

"You're crying again. Sshhh." He wrapped me around his arms, enough to give me warmth and comfort causing me to break down more.

How is it so possible to make someone feel hurt and exhilarated all at the same time? And all just through a hug?

Benjamin hushed me but I only continued crying. My tears burst forth like a pail overflowing its excess water.

I want to tell him everything, but I know it will only stir him to confusion.

I'll just keep it to myself.

"I don't think this is just because of your PMS or whatever you call that. Baby, it's making me insane hearing your weep. What is it?" His words were soft and soothing but I just shook my head in between his chest and arms.

"Good afternoon, Ma'am. I'll just put these on the lateral drawer," ani Lanie nang makapasok sa opisina ko.