Jacob is interviewing Santana. He is looking at her boobs.
Jacob: How was your summer?
Santana: My eyes are up here, Jewfro. And it was uneventful.
****
Santana is in Sue's office, sitting on a chair in front of her desk.
Sue: A little bird told me that someone spent her summer vacation getting a brand-new set of melons, even though you know I have a very strict "no plastics" policy in Cheerios. Care to comment?
Santana: I just–
Sue: What would possess a person your age to get a boob job? You don't even know what your body's gonna look like. It's an insult to nature and completely distracting. I can't take my eyes off them. I'm actually talking to them right now.
Santana: I wanted people to notice me more. I don't get what the big deal is.
Sue: Well, the big deal is that a person who has to pump her nonnies full of gravy to feel good about herself... clearly doesn't have the self-esteem to be my head cheerleader. Quinn will replace you.
Santana can't get words out.
Sue: Oh, and, Boobs McGee, you're demoted to the bottom of the pyramid, so when it collapses, your exploding sandbags will protect the squad from injury. Now take your juicy, vine-ripened chest fruit... and get the hell out of my office.
Santana gets up and leaves.
****
Santana pushes Quinn in the hallway up against the lockers. Quinn pushes back.
Santana: You did this to me. You told Coach Sylvester about my summer surgery!
Quinn: You have a surgery when you get your appendix out. You got a boob job!
Santana: Yep, sure did.
Santana slaps Quinn.
Quinn: You can't hit me.
Santana: Sure, I can. Unless you got yourself knocked up again, slut!
Quinn grabs Santana and slams her against the locker.
Brittany: Stop the violence.
They continue fighting by slapping each other and pulling on each other's hair. Santana throws Quinn on the ground. She stands up and Will comes over to break up the fight.
Will: Hey! Hey! What is this? What happened to us being a family? Hey!
Santana: Oh, please. She has a family. She's a mother.
Quinn: *screaming* Walk away. And tighten up your pony before you get to class!
Santana walks off.
YOU ARE READING
Santana Lopez Quotes (GLEE)
HumorSantana Lopez is my second favorite character on Glee, behind Blaine. She's my favorite girl character. She's hilarious and strong. She can be a little mean, but she does it hilariously. Enjoy every single Santana Lopez quote from the show. :)
