28 days

Day thirteen

Post concert depression is real, and I was suffering from it hard, even at 11:49 pm the day after my concert. I stretched my legs over the side of the bed and stood up slowly creeping out of my room. I noticed a small light coming through the crack in Ashtons door and I couldn't help but smile, something was different between us two, something had changed in the past 24 hours since the concert, and despite how much I didn't want to let myself feel anything for Ashton, I was starting to.

I knocked softly on his door, a small 'come in' travelled through the door, I pushed it opened slowly stepping in.

"Sorry to bother you" I laughed quietly suddenly nervous

"You're not bothering me" He smirked sitting up on his bed

"Im just suffering from really bad post concert depression" I sighed sitting down on the edge of his bed

"The concert was yesterday its expected" he shrugged

"I guess" I sighed

"you alright?" he asked moving closer towards me

"you're going to think I'm annoying" I laughed almost to myself

"no I wont" He sighed slinging his arm around me as if to re-assure me.

"why are you, well why were you, scared of me getting to know you to well" I whispered, his arm tensed around my body and I could almost hear his heart beat quicken.

"well" he sighed

"well" I laughed

"you getting to know me too well played a big part in the fear I have"

"ashton" I groaned standing up

"what skyla?" he groaned back

"Im sick of you saying you have a fear rather then telling me what it is so we can work through it." I practically screamed looking at him

He sat there staring at me as if trying to process what I had just said

"What that too soon" I thought aloud

"No" He whispered looking up at me

"So what do we do to help you move on from this fear." I sighed

"I want to work through it Skyla, and I want to work through it with you, but I'm just not ready to." He whimpered placing his head in his hands

"How could you not be ready" I screeched causing him to look up

"Sky"

"Don't sky me for fucks sake Ashton, it's been 2 years! 2 years and you're 'not ready'" I laughed groaning.

"I know it sounds bad but if you just listen to me"

"Listen to you!. listen to you tell me you're not ready to tell me, listen to you say you regret letting some stupid fear keep you from me, listen to you make up every excuse to avoid telling me." I ranted walking towards his door and out of his room,

I waled towards the dark kitchen. I don't know what ashton wants, one day he says he regrets things and the next his turning away from me again.

I sighed loudly finding the cocopops and milk and pouring them into a bowl.

I looked up at the clock, 11:59, I sighed showing a spoonful of cocopops into my mouth, one more minute and I was a day closer to being away from Ashton and his mix-signals.