written in the stars

chapter 4

I do not own the 100. I am just a fan writing fanfic.

Clarke's P.O.V.

I opened my eyes. I felt like I was being crushed. I couldn't breathe. I was being pinned to the cot and I couldn't fucking breathe.

I panicked pushing against the blankets and trying to take this stupid sweater off. It was all too much on me, it was too warm. I struggled against the cot sinking further into it.

I rolled out of the cot sending my body crashing into the floor. The bruises from yesterday ached as I hit the hard surface. The wind was knocked out of me. I let out a cry of pain and tried to push my self up. I heard commotion beside me and stopped breathing completely.

Think. Think. Think. You were alone. You fell asleep alone, no ones here. Calm down. I tried to compose myself but I started to shake. What if he came back? What if he was just waiting till I was awake? I clutched at my throat, as if trying to get it to open up. I was having a panic attack.

I had read about them before. Breathe, I told myself. Relax, put your head between your legs and breathe. I couldn't do it.

I heard another noise and I panicked as I looked around the room. I started to cry. What if he was in here, just trying to scare me? IT WAS FUCKING WORKING!!! I told myself to calm down but it only made it worse. I heard a creak in the floor like weight being shifted and squeezed my eyes shut.

"Clarke?" I stilled. "Clarke, Clarke its me. It's Bellamy. Clarke look at me." I froze. Bellamy. Bellamy wasn't here, he was on a hunting trip. I started to shake again. I felt a hand rest on my shoulder and almost completely lost my shit. I snapped my eyes open and yanked the hand off of me.

I stared at the figure crouched in front of me. Bellamy. My breath hitched. He was here. He was back. I started to sob again, sending the boy in front of me into a blind panic. He reached out for me and I flinched. Smooth Clarke. He looked at my face trying to get me to look at his eyes. I met his gaze cautiously. He tried to understand what was going on, "hey, Princess. Whats wrong?" He asked. I flinched at the nickname despite trying desperately not to. A small look of hurt and worry crossed his face. He looked at my for what seemed like a long time, I realized he was waiting for an answer.

I stopped crying the best I could. "I- I, it's nothing" I ended trying to be as convincing as I could be. He didn't seem to buy it. I couldn't blame him. "Clarke?!" Bellamy said in a serious tone. "What happened? I found you in here last night drunk. Crying. Kind of like you are now. What the hell happened?" He pushed. "Nothing. I was having a bad day. I closed up the med bay and found some moonshine." I said as calmly as I could manage. He looked at me studying me for a moment. He broke out a small smile, "so your a sappy drunk Princess." I forced out a small smile and nodded.

"You know I barely recognized you last night. You were all wrapped up in that blanket and you were wearing those new clothes." He said. I smiled again trying not to think about why I was wearing new clothes. "Anyway if you want to go back to your tent I can make sure nobody gets hurt, so you'll have the day off." I nodded and got up.Bellamy turned to me, "you would tell me if something was wrong. Wouldn't you?" He asked me with pleading eyes. It was odd, I think he really cared. It made lying to him more difficult. "Ya for sure" I said. NO I WOULDN'T, COME BACK. DONT GO. I LIED. I silently screamed, knowing he wouldn't hear me. I watched him walk away and I felt completely alone.

Bellamy's P.O.V.

I had woken up to the sound of Clarke crying. Was she STILL drunk. Goddamm moonshine. I slowly got out of the cot and looked around until I saw Clarke sitting on the ground shaking.

"Clarke?!" I called out which seemed to only make matters worse. I tried to get her to tell me what was wrong. At one point I even placed a hand on her shoulder which did not go over well. What really hurt was when she flinched at me calling her Princess. She may not have liked it but she had never reacted like that before. After a bit she started to breath normally, I relaxed a bit and told her how I found her last night. She smiled and nodded, being unusually quite. I figured she was just tired or hung over. We weren't super close but we trusted each other, so if something was wrong I expected her to tell me. She stayed silent but I didn't quite believe her.