Golden Hour

8

Harry was mad at me. I mean he had to be, right? I was spending the day with Sarah since the band flew in a few days ago. They had to be on BBC 1 tomorrow which I was invited to watch. It's been two days since my drunken birthday and I didn't remember a thing. After Gemma left all I know is Harry and I continued drinking. It was such a blur.

When I woke up I smelt coffee in the air and smiled, Harry knew I loved coffee. When I walked into he kitchen expecting to see Harry it was empty. But, there was a note by the coffee pot.

Gone to meet the band, see you soon.

Harry xx

I had been to London a few times and had a few friends, one of them being Ed. I didn't want to meet Harry and the band because they needed to practice, but I did want to meet up with Ed and see if we could write soon. Which is how I found myself taking tequila shots at 2 in the afternoon at Ed's house.

"So, tell me how is Harry?"

"Good, finished his album. It releases on the 13th! It's gonna be epic," I said excitedly. I loved talking about Harry's music more than mine almost.

"Can't wait to hear it, but let's talk about you. Where is this album taking you?" He was referring to my album I was currently working on.

"I don't know, it's a mixture of the last few years, moving to LA, falling in love, falling out of love." All of my falling in love songs weren't about Jason though. I don't know who they were about. Maybe it was falling in love with myself? Not in a narcissistic way, but a way where I could be whole and complete on my own. I never liked the phrase other half when talking about relationships. A person shouldn't rely on someone else to make them whole. You have to be whole on your own, how are you going to give just half of yourself away?

Maybe they were about falling in love with your best friend, my subconscious teased.

Ed and I did a lot of talking and brainstorming which was my favorite. Sometimes Ed could take what I was feeling and put it into words that I couldn't. Later that day I finally made it back to Harry's to see him sitting on the couch watching tv.

"Hi," I said plotting myself next to him. "How was practice?"

"It was fine," he replied shortly.

"Doesn't sound fine," I remarked to his blunt reply.

"It was fine, really. Just tired."

We didn't much more talking. I learned with Harry that sometimes he just needed to process things internally before talking about whatever was on his mind. But, it had been 2 days now and he still hasn't talked to me about what's going on.

"Is everything alright with Harry?" Sarah asked as we walked around London. We were taking a walk through St. James park, it was absolutely lush.

"What do you mean?"

"Well, he hasn't really been present at rehearsals. He's physically there but his mind is so absent."

"Honestly, I have no idea. I mean the day he went to meet you guys I didn't see him that morning and later that day he was so short with me. I figured he just needed time to process whatever is going on in his mind but he's still being distant," I paused taking a breath in. "Could he be mad at me? I don't know what I would have done but usually if I do something to upset him he talks to me."

"I don't think it's you," Sarah abruptly stopped grasping my arm causing me to stumble back in confusion.

"What are you-" I began to say as my eyes followed to where she was looking. There, on the bridge in St. James park looking to Buckingham Palace was Harry kissing someone. I don't know why but I felt two strange emotions I wasn't expecting: betrayal and jealousy.