The Switch (ViceRylle)

39. Let Her

95,

 

96,

 

97,

 

98,

 

99,

 

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“Vice!”

 

My heart jumps. It seems that odds are on my favor now. Thank you Lord. 

Then I felt that that someone is holding my shoulders. I almost drop my phone nang makita ang babaeng nasa harapan ko ngayon. I don’t expect to see her here, standing in front of me. 

Agad agad naman akong nagpalinga linga sa paligid, sa likod niya. I’m just hoping she’s with someone but there’s no one. I panicked. Parang pinanawan ng lakas ang katawan ko at nanghina ang aking tuhod. I am just staring at her. Her face shows extreme sadness. I can see defeat through her eyes. Her eyes is suggesting me that I should lose my hope now.

 Yung excitement ko kanina ay unti-unting nawala.

“You’re late, Vice.”

 

It's almost a whisper but it really deafens me. Nakakabingi. Those are the only words that came out from Tita Zsazsa’s mouth but those are enough to shatter my heart into million pieces. It’s as if I am a living dead.  I can feel my body is deteriorating. I just found myself kneeling, no, almost kissing the floor. I can feel my flesh trembling maybe because of too much crying.

I was drowned to extreme confusion. It lasted only few minutes and my senses pushed me to stand up. Di ako dapat tumatanga ng ganito.

“Tita, saan po pumunta si K?!! Susundan ko po siya!! Tita? Sabihin niyo po?!! Saan!!?” Tila natatakasan na ko ng bait habang kinakusap si Tita Zsazsa. Pinagtitinginan na din ako ng mga tao sa airport. At yung guard na kasama ko ay papalapit na sa akin at tatangkaing pigilan ako.

But I just froze when I saw tears roll down on Tita Zsazsa’s face. She’s crying. D*mn she’s aching.

“Anak, hayaan na natin siya. You know K, matapang yung kaibigan mo na yun at alammodin gaano katigas ang ulo nun. She requested to let her do this on her own, masakit man but let’s give it to her. Kaya nya yan. May tiwala ka naman sa kanya diba? She’ll come back soon. She will, anak.”

 

I’m really confused. Ayokong mawala si K. I wanna be beside her throughout the process. I want her to feel that she’s not alone. Pero aat the same time parang gustong makinig ng utak ko kay Tita Zsazsa. Anong magagawa ko kung siya mismo ang pumili na mapag-isa. But also, ano pang magagawa ko if you’ll see someone you consider as your second mom crying in front of you. It’s heartbreaking. It’s terrifying.

Suddenly, I have this urge to hug her. I really need to feel comforted. I need a shoulder.

Little did I know, she reached for my hand and pulled me for a hug. Di ko na napigilan ang sarili ko and I bursted out. I cried my heart out. Pakiramdam ko ay biglaang gumuho ang mundo ko. Si Karylle na ang mundo ko. Siya ang buhay ko. Wala na ang buhay ko.

“Let her go.”

I can’t decipher what those words mean, no, I don’t want to decipher.

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Short and filler update.

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