One Shots

Losing

Another one of marisa407 's
Tam's POV:
If I am happy for her, then why is my heart slowly breaking?Three months ago, Sierra came home a different person, she was distant and never wanted to go out in public with me. I thought she was just stressed out because of the 25th anniversary of Phantom of the Opera was happening. I decided to let her be distant, I didn't push her to talk me, I just let her be. In all honesty it was a big mistake I pushed her away even more, I pushed her further and further into his arms. But somewhere in my heart I realized that us being engaged to each other was a mistake. For me, it was going to end in heartbreak, but I kept pushing the thought out of my head because I didn't want to believe it. "Sierra, sweetie, umm when would you like to get married? We have been engaged for a while now, and well I would like to get married soon." I really did want to marry her but she didn't want to marry me. She wanted to marry another man: Ramin Karimloo, or what she calls him 'her phantom'. "I don't care Tam whenever you want too. Maybe we can do it after I am done with Phantom, because you know I am really busy." "Sure that's fine Love, no worries." She gave me a kiss on the cheek and left for rehearsals. I decided to follow herbecause I knew that she doesn't have rehearsals on Sunday. I needed to see for myself that Sierra was with him and not just me being crazy and thinking these absurd thoughts. Sadly, my gut was right, Sierra went to Ramin's apartment and didn't come out until three hours later, her hair was a mess and her clothes were disheveled, my heart broke. I saw this coming but I wasn't ready to accept the truth. I drove back to the apartment and acted like nothing ever happened. Sierra came home a few moments later, giving me a kiss on the cheek, saying the empty lie of 'I Love you'. Her saying that phrase gave me false hope about us. I was trying so damn hard to hold back my tears "I love you too oh so much." But I couldn't hide it anymore, my heart broke,tears started to fall from my eyes. She cupped my face and wiped the tears away. "Tam. Honey. What's wrong why are you crying? Is everything okay?" I wept even more at her touch, we haven't held each other, we haven't held hands or just gave each other a simple hug in weeks. I grabbed her hand and kissed the inside of her palm. "Sierra honey we need talk, things aren't the same anymore. We're losing you and me. Lets just call a truce on this silent war." I released her hands, trying to get used to the feeling of not touching her anymore. I couldn't bear to look at her because I know she will never be mine, her heart belongs to somebody else, her heart belongs to him. "Tam, I have no idea what you are talking about? I'm scared please tell me what's happening?" she stepped in to give me a hug, I put my hands up to stop her. "Stop acting Sierra, I know the truth, I know what is going on between you and Ramin. Stop playing these games just tell me. No more lies." She was shocked, her bottom lip started to quiver, I turned away so I didn't have to see her cry. "T-tam I'm so s-sorry. P-please forgive me. I'll stop s-seeing Ramin I- I p-promise ." She slipped her arms around my waist to hug me. I turned to hug her back, knowing this will be the last time I will hold her and be this close to her. "Sierra, it's okay. You don't have to explain to me. I've known for a long time that this was bound to happen. My heart is telling me to let you go even though I will be heartbroken." I kissed the top of her hand and I let her go. "I love you Sierra, I'll never stop, and you know I'll never will." I went to the bedroom packed my stuff and walked out the door, leaving the woman I love behind.