While We Were Away ||KNJ||

SURVIVED

when I slept
I found your shadow in the verses
translated a whole alphabets
from the beats of soul that tempestuous
~copyright and by adheez van der beanthz

..............

You sit on the chair of the cozy cafe, sipping on your plain black coffee.

You look around at various people sitting around having casual conversations.

The cafe is littered with colours all around it.

Some in golds while some in silvers.

There are colours all around you.

People wearing colours.

People in colours.

You sigh as you completely drink your coffee and get up.

For once you aren't wearing colours at all.

But does it even matter any more?

Colours, that is?

What's the point to be to see when you still feel like a hallow trunk.

When once colours brought you joy, they only bring pain now.

The thoughts of him accompanying the pain.

It has been two years since then but it still feels like it was just yesterday.

You close your eyes to remind yourself of his beautiful smile; his deep dimples curving into his cheeks.

"Bogo Shipda" You mumble.

You no longer lived in New York.
You wanted a fresh start because back there everything hurt.

The knowledge of seeing him down the road to the knowledge of waking up on a concrete floor only to be struck with immense pain in your heart.

You moved to South Korea just as soon as you could.

But there was no point because nobody knew about him. You couldn't find his family.

It was like he had no existance what so ever.

Like as if he never even existed in the first place.

But life moved on in between clutching pain and burning tears.

Life simply went on and on with no reason for you to live.

You were simply awaiting death now.

There was no contact from Charmeine either but slowly slowly you were forgetting the little things that happened.

You had to remind yourself from the words that you wrote down the time when you first forgot but those weren't of much help either.

It felt like your body rejected all the pain and was resetting everything.

But the emotions that you once had failed to do a good job.

They still remained and still haunted you till this day.

...............

You unlock your apartment and sit on the sofa placed in the living room.

You throw your shoes away and then change your plain white clothes for another set of plain white clothes.

You rest your head on the side of the sofa to get some shut eye for a while.

If only you could sleep and never wake up.