the dawn of us

if i was enough for you

if i was enough for you
good things would have
happened

but you're greedy
as you take and take
grab and steal
with the sight of never ending
as your craving for more
swallows you whole

and you're left with only
a bit of your soul

i remember when you held me
in the car
where many of my stories
had taken place
you held me tight has you cried
your eyes out

as you talked about
your brokenness
as you talked about
breaking apart

after i had left
in your honest splurge
of it all

and like a desert
or a drought
my tears for you had run dry
a long time ago

my tears for you
left to soak in other places
left to waste away on other things

because when
we sat there as
you counted the days
till the end
confessing the end coming
like it was true

you told me
i shouldn't shed tears for you
you told me to hold it deep
because it could only fill
the well of anger
inside your pitiless soul

because when we
were stood in front of
the shambles of a fallen castle
you were filling all the rivers
all the oceans

that i simply didn't need to
but i realized you took all my tears

and i was left to dehydrate
swallow my own tongue
as your ice box filled with
all the things you had left

filled your hands
and i was only left
to be reminded of your greediness

if i was good enough for you
then you would have shed more
tears for me
you would have loved me
with it all

not on occasional days
or special holidays

you would have moved
the moon with your love
if you loved me

has it sways the
ocean current too

i can only say
the leftover angry words
before even i am too
swallowed by it

but if you loved me
then i wouldn't ask god
every night
if i was worthy of loving at all

i wouldn't have apologized
countless times
for who i am

quick to burn myself
in scalding hot water
before standing tall

if you loved me
maybe i would love myself
a little more

a lot more
but even with my love
were you greedy

as you took all i could ever give
and reminded me
of those i shouldn't love

but if you really did
care

maybe this time
i would have
fallen apart a little less
than i always do.