when i go to sleep

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there's times
when i go to sleep

sleeping deeply

i imagine myself
in your arms
holding me

as you whisper
your apologies
in my ear

and i cry
pour oceans
out of my eyes

waterfalls
falling over cliffs
after borders
finally be broken down

i cant tell if it's
a dream or a nightmare

but i do know
i wake up scared

and i'd
have many dreams like that

as i try
to forget
all the different
types of hurt

i've been put through

try to heal
bruises and scars
wounds deeper
than i'm able to handle

but then
you come again
and come again

like your trying
to explain everything
in my head

or maybe
all i want is just one word
from you
instead

maybe
i just need you
like you needed me

wrap it all up
because no matter what
i'm always bleeding

bleeding memories
of you leaving

trying to find
remedies

as i remember you
weeping
grieving

sometimes
i dream of you
shaking my hand
fighting for me

stroking my head
as you remind me
of your love

and i can only be
graced with slumber

then i wake up.

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