The unspoken emotions

Lockdown effects

Hmmm so as lockdown proceeded gradually so is their proximity cheek kisses changed to lip kisses n smooches very often normal hugs changed to hugging with hands inside t shirts feeling up their bare bodies sleeping positions exchanged now Sid used to put one arm on her waist one leg on her legs and face on her chest with role reversal sid getting more touchy n demanded Sana to even sit outside washroom n keep talking while he bathes not leaving closeness with her even for a second listening to all her talks then there was work assignments big boss watching N social media content which sid let her do .. but there was an undefined limit that Sid always made sure he didn't cross and Sana always thinking about the reason behind doing so as she has already openly confessed her love for him and he didn't deny it either n his actions of being all over her all the time was not justifying his held bk on moving forward to claim her as his own . Sana also was aware how his fans are perceiving her to use his name to gain success and all other kind of lame blames on her but what's bothering her the most is this unknown unexplained distance between them she didn't want to cross this line firstly being shy n secondly she doesn't want to come across like forcing her love on him . What's killing her inside most was He never said he loves her even to her forget about the world n on the other hand now as she is getting familiar with Bollywood industry she sees even unofficial couples posting selfies together being cozy n close and here he is not even giving her any assurance n comfort off camera .
N then the lockdown left her with no choice but to stay there as she needs to take care of him in absence of his mom !
She was feeling suffocated and was losing herself with each passing day n ek din gusse me she posted on social media indicating Sid doesn't value her n she should be with someone who values but deleted it later ,
Everything was getting piled up inside her !
While thinking all this she noticed the house bar of Sid n decided to derive the energy to confront him from somewhere else !
She dressed up in a red saree with a backless blouse with deep neck little subtle make up as he likes and went to the bar n gulped whole quarter bottle of neat vodka down her throat it burned her inside so sucked onto half cut lemon so that her mouth tastes well .
Sid unaware of what's happening around came out of the washroom in a towel with wet hair and water droplets still on his bare hot torso .
Sana fully intoxicated and looking irresistibly sexy n tempting kicks open the door and walked inside with twisted gait .
Sid's jaw dropped almost to the ground seeing her like this n he almost fainted at the sight when she turned to lock the door flashing her bare back in a saree .While Sid cleated his blurring vision n focus Sana moves closer to him wrapping her arms around his neck asked looking into his eyes " how am I looking baby " to which Sid responded still in hangover of what he just saw " tempting n super hot "
Sana slowly moved her fingers around his neck to his hair asking " Sachi Kha kasam"
Sid -"sachi" n he could smell n figure out that she is drunk so he immediately asked " tuney pi hui hai "
Sana covered her mouth pulling back n slowly said "thodi si zaroori thi"
Sid went to the bar to find out the empty bottle n was amazed at her capacity but worried too as how will he handle her specially in this deadly avatar!
Sid moved back to the room sternly ordering her to change n go sleep in her room today
But sana was on a different trip today n was feeling free under the effect of alcohol
Sana moved closer leaned her bare back to his chest and held both his hands n slid along her hands to her bare milky white tummy making Sid loose it all of the control he had for almost so long she asked turning her face towards him " why puttu " kissing his cheek n moving her one hand up caressing his cheek
Sid jerked her off n commanded " see sana kuch ho jaayega tu jaa yahaan se abhi n u r drunk too "
Sana came charging towards him
N pinned him against wall the started kissing his chest which made him moan a little with eyes closed and moved up to his earlobe biting it softly saying " to roka kisne hai claim me to be yours "
Sid somehow regained himself n told angrily (pretending not really angry ) " Tera dimaag khraab ho Gaya hai kya paagal hai tu just leave my room right away"
Hearing this Sana's bottled up emotions bursted out from her eyes and she felt insulted and started crying n ran to her room
N locked the door from inside threw things here n there in her room
Sid felt bad n guilty for being rude to her in this vulnerable state but shocked also to see why she is reacting in this manner as she is used to his angry self n she is the one who calms her down .
Here sana broke down crying endlessly completely shattered from inside
Sid went to her room after 10 minutes could hear her crying badly n throwing things he knocked the door saying " sana! Baby please open the door " no response " baby please talk to me what's wrong"  she replied out of anger n self disgust " thanks mujhey yeh yaad dilaane k liye ki main kabhi Teri life Ka hissa thi hi nahi , mujhey pata hai tu mujhey apney laayak nahi samajhta , mera standard Teri aur gfs ki tarah nahi hai na aur mujhey English Bhi nahi aati ! Again bursting into tears n crying loudly tu mujhey yahan laaya hi Kyu ! Kyu mere itney Kareeb aaya jab tujhey mujhey kabhi apnana hi Nahi tha ! Arrey sorry tu thodey hi naa aaya mere kareeb main hi chep ho Gayi tere galey pad gayi I am really sorry but now I know the truth very well and u ensured it by pushing me away that I am just another girl whom u r just helping but sorry sir mujhey nahi chahiye help aur naa hi main aapki obligation banna chahti hu main kahan struggling new comer aap badey established actor ho aapne mujhey itne kareeb aane diya humaara naseeb par bas ab mujhey maaf ker dijiye ab main nahi chahti aap mujhey aur jhelein I will leave tomorrow morning positively " and again started crying inconsolably lying on her bed now
Sid tears uncontrollably flowing and was feeling very bad listening to how sana felt bcoz of him on the other side of the door crashed to ground by now . Sid was cursing himself for making her feel so worthless n low . He again knocked on the door " sana please ek baar meri Baat to
Sun le please aisa kuch bhi nahi hai jaisa tu soch rahi hai tujhey pata hai na tu mujhey kitna affect kerti hai mujhey hi pata hai Maine Khud ko kaide roka hai I so very want to make u mine but I am too scared to hurt u I care for u too much so much that u cannot even imagine I never felt this way u t the most beautiful woman n purest human being I hv come across I didn't even imagine that a person like u can even exist so selfless with such beautiful soul , arrey I used to think ki main tujhey deserve kerta bhi hu ya Nahi main tere laayak Kaise banu maine apni zindagi shuru se kyu nahi jee tere saath tune to meri normal life mujhey wapas di hai by believing in me standing by me through out accepting me openly clearing my name from past all allegations , I stopped myself thinking am I worthy of u , paagal hai tu mera bas chale to yeh lockdown humesha k liye lagwa du as I want to stay locked down with u forever , sirf tere career ki wajah se publicly nahi bola bcoz I know it matters the most to u please don't leave me I can't imagine life without u maine MA. He felt her hand on his lips she sitting down on the floor " khabardaar jo aisi baat sochi bhi maar dungi tujhey yeh bhi sirf mera hi haqq hai " n both giggled while having their eyes full of tears n he pulled her into a very tight hug sobbing and saying " don't u dare think of leaving me ever " to which she replied softly in his ear " then mark me as yours now n forever " Sid tightening his hold on her further and ....

Arrey patience sab kuch aaj hi bata du have patience hehehe.... neend aa rahi hai baki kal ..