James' Point Of View
When our food got done Michael gave me a sad look as he gave it to us. I barely touched my food because frankly, I'm not in the mood for it anymore. We got it wrapped up and Alec Payed and we left, Michael still giving me that sad look.
Alec's day wasn't over I guess because we weren't heading in the direction of my house, instead we were heading in the direction out of town. We stopped and walked to our spot. He smiled and sat down, motioning for me to sit beside him. I did as he wanted but felt horrible as I did, Michael's sad face hurts me then I could ever tell or anyone could ever know. Alec wanted to relax and watch the trees sway and listen to the natural life.
"Do you actually care about that guy?" Alec asked.
I couldn't bring myself to answer his question. "I'm sorry, I.. I don't exactly know how to answer that question." I told him.
"Is it in fear of being hurt or because you simply don't know how you feel for him." He asked me. "Answer truthfully."
"Do I have to answer at all?" I asked, surprisingly he didn't make me tell him, he just looked up at the sky. He disregarded his topic. We sat there for a while, nothing happened. I guess today is a good day.
He was playing with his necklace around my neck. I was just looking around at the scene, it is very nice. "You have to go to school tomorrow right?" He asked In a soft voice I forgot he had.
"Yeah." I told him.
"Do you want me to pick you up and give you a ride home?" He asked.
"You don't have to." I answered.
"Do you want me to?" He asked making it to where he can look me in the face.
"Sure." I answered him.
We sat there for a little while longer, I didn't want to talk because I didn't want to make him mad. I looked at my left hand, the broken one, he was looking at it.
I was about to get up when Alec stopped me and pulled me back down. "I don't want to leave yet." He told me.
"I just thought that since it's going to be dark soon that we might need to go home." I told him.
"I don't want to leave yet." He told me. I am, any minute he can get angry with me for some small reason and I could end up laying on the ground coughing up blood.
"I'm sorry." I told him getting back in the position I was in before I got up.
"It's fine." He smiled.
"Why are you acting so nice to me?" I asked him.
"Would you rather me be how I normally am?" He asked.
"No I was just wondering." I told him.
"I just want to have a nice day, I don't like hurting you. You just make me angry at times and.." he stopped talking and I didn't bother to ask why. We sat there for hours until it was dark it was very long.
When It got dark he wanted to go to his truck, he kissed me on my lips and turned on the music in his truck we sat there and hung out for a while before leaving.
"We are doing this tomorrow when you get out of school." He told me.
"I don't know if I can." I told him, I don't want to spend time with him. After that one little comment he got angry and almost punched me I closed my eyes but it never came, he stopped himself. It's like he can hold in a few big blow ups but as soon as one small one after a few big ones he'd lash out.
But he stopped himself.
"Get out." He said harshly. "Please."
I nodded and got out as quickly as I could. He hasn't been very nice and he will probably go back to normal tomorrow. Pain.
He brings me so much pain.
I went inside and ran up the stairs.
Michael: Hey!
Me: Please just leave me alone.
Michael: why won't you just tell me what is wrong?
Me: Lose my phone number.
Michael: No.
The texts stopped.
"Tell me what's going wrong." Kara said barging into my room.
"What is it?" I asked her.
"Well.. Blake. My new boyfriend he is so nice, I mean really nice. But my ex Keagan wants to get back together with me after we broke up.." she plopped on my bed beside me.
"So you have a sweet guy that likes you and then a guy that is such a d-bag and you don't know which to pick?" I asked her. "The choice seems pretty obvious to me."
I could compare her situation to mine, mine is just more extreme and harder to figure out, I want to be with the sweet guy but my horrible ex is getting in the way of it.. and I can't really do anything about it. My ex is strong, and he makes me feel weak. But Michael makes me feel strong, smart, and I just want to hug him and kiss him. Alec came in and ruined it, not to mention the fact that I can't tell anyone I am in an abusive relationship because I can't have anyone finding out that I'm gay.
Why me?
"He does seem like the right choice, but I don't want to hurt Keagan." She said putting her head in her hands.
That little man whore isn't going to be hurt because of the one girl that decided to see the real him. "Kara, he is a hoe." I told her.
"I know but he says when he is with someone, it doesn't feel right because he thinks about me." That little hoe is playing my little sister, guess who his big brother is.. the football player, Corbett.
"Tell that little d-bag to leave you alone, and if you don't I will." I told her.
"Okay." She said looking down At her hands.
She stayed for a little while and talked about random things that have no importance to me like how Blake is so nice and they shared a shake.
Don't get me wrong if he wasn't a sweet guy I'd go punch the guy in his face but in my current situation I don't like talking about my boyfriend did this, my boyfriend did that.
