One punch man! (Saitama x reader insert)

The Varieties of Shame

Okay, my bad waiting this long to update

But this is a hella long chapter, so hopefully, that makes up for my procrastination

Also, I dropped a LOT of f-bombs in this chapter, so PG-13??

Enjoy!

P.S.: sorry about fucking up the titles, already fixed it ;p

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"This is your last chance to surrender, Garo!" A spiky-haired guy with a gun, who I'm assuming is Death Gatling, said. They had him surrounded by heroes, with two arrows in his right shoulder. "Not how you figured you'd be going out, huh? Well, that's too bad, hero hunter. Every hero here is a veteran who's faced down death countless times. I brought in the heroes I personally know are the best, with an unexpected appearance of (L/n)-san... just to hunt your ass down!"

"'The best', you say? (Y/n), am I the only one who feels something's off about that term? Where are the rest of the Class S heroes? Doesn't the Hero Association understand how dangerous I am? These bargain-basement mediocrities barely get my blood up!" Garo complains, directing his attention to me as I huffed.

"Who said we were on a first-name basis? There's no way in hell I'd treat you as an equal." I argued, crossing my arms.

"Wow, harsh! And I thought we were soulmates!"

"Hell would freeze over if I ever chose you!"

"So even a criminal like you cares only about Class S, eh?" We looked over at Death Gatling in confusion as his tone changed. "They sure are popular, the S Class heroes. They get paid off the charts by the Hero Association, and they get let in on secrets that we're not privy to." I shifted a bit, uncomfortable about the way he talked about my rank. "Even though we're all heroes, the gap is huge! The rankings to decide who's on top are so arbitrary that lots of capable heroes don't get fairly recognized. They may not be Class S, but they're still tough as hell. And you, hero monster! You've got all this attention for taking out and kidnapping Class S heroes. That makes you the perfect target for proving my point!"

"But (Y/n)'s the only Class S hero here." Garo pointed out.

"I'm not here to fight you, plus I kind of agree with Gatling's claim on how biased the system is in the Association." I stood my ground, backing away from the fight.

"...So that's why there are no other Class S heroes here. You guys want to take all the credit. Any kid who heard you would be so let down." I looked over at the shed, feeling pity for the hero fan inside. "I heard there's some 'Monster Association' kicking your teeth in. You sure a loner like me should be your priority? What about that hostage who needs rescuing?"

"Once you're dealt with, the Monster Association comes next. We'll be the ones to take all you upstart monsters out." To be honest, Garo looked like a piece of shit after getting a single kick by Saitama.

Smile Man, Shooter, and Chain'n'toad all attacked Garou at once, making him dodge them all barely.

"The poison's taken effect." Stinger pointed out as that answered my concerns.

"He can't take much more." Death Gatling added as I tilted my head.

Either I'm dumb as shit, or I'm overthinking this, cause I still don't understand why we're fighting him. He's a "hero monster" but right now he's a human acting cocky to protect another human.

"Men are so hard to understand," I mumbled, focusing back onto the fight.

Chain'n'toad grabbed Garou's ankle, putting him off-balance as Smile Man threw his ball. Garou broke the ground underneath him, pivoting his whole body to hit the ball into Chain'n'toad's path. Smile Man tried to pull his ball back to him as Garou took Chain'n'toad's kusarigama (chain-sickle), cutting the wire.