Serenity - Ellie Williams [1]

3.

L̶o̶o̶k̶ ̶f̶o̶r̶ ̶t̶h̶e̶ ̶l̶i̶g̶h̶t̶

𝐞𝐧𝐝𝐮𝐫𝐞 𝐚𝐧𝐝 𝐬𝐮𝐫𝐯𝐢𝐯𝐞

Ellie

"I'm not arguing about this" I glare at Tommy, who sits on the couch with his hands in his lap, head hanging. I can see the grief in his frame, it mirrors my own. I ball my hands, willing the tears in my eyes away, using the rage in my chest to keep them at bay. He's gone, really gone. And I never got to forgive him.

"Ellie, we can't just torture that girl for information. It wouldn't be right." Tommy says, voice hard like he's already made up his mind. "And we can't go on a wild goose chase for revenge. Joel wouldn't have wanted- "

"Don't tell me what Joel would have wanted!" She shouts, far louder than intended. It's not right, for me to fight with a man who just lost his brother. Not even a body to bury. They couldn't even give us that. "If it were any one of us who died, Joel would already be gone." The words as a hiss, no longer yelling. Ellie begins to pace the room, feeling absolutely restless as she tries to come up with a plan.

"I know, Dammit, I know." Tommy says suddenly, letting out a long sigh. I can tell he's just as lost as me. I can't let this go. Bringing her knuckles to her mouth, she bites down hard on one to keep from crying. Still, a tear escapes to wet her cheek- she doesn't bother to wipe it. "I know you want to go after them, you think I don't? We have people that need us here- everyone is shaken by this."

"Joel needed me- and I wasn't there." Tommy's shoulders fall, and he stands from the couch with slight hesitance. "I was off with Dina getting high instead of worrying about you two- it's my fault Tommy." The tears fall freely now and Ellie can barely breathe, gasping into her fist.

"it wasn't your fault." Tommy reaches for her, grabbing her shoulder and pulling Ellie against his chest. She tucks into his shirt, hiding, and he wraps both arms around her frame. "We were outnumbered and had no idea." Ellie lets him hug her tight, freely sobbing now that he's not looking.

"All I could do was beg, Tommy. And she didn't care." She cries, still able to feel the hands holding her down as Joel writhed on the floor. Silent. In pain. If it had been me on the other end of that golf club Joel would have done anything to save me- but I was too weak.

"None of that now, it wasn't your fault." Tommy's hand comes to the top of her head, resting there like A comforting presence. If I really try, I can just pretend he's Joel- that he's still alive. Eventually her sobs quiet, collecting herself, but unable to pull away from the warmth of Tommy's embrace.

The door to the shed abruptly slams open, smashing into the other wall so loudly that Ellie pulls from Tommy and reaches for her gun that isn't there. She lets out a sigh of relief when she sees Jesse standing in the doorway, looking far too nervous. "What's going on?" Tommy asks, his own voice sounding rough as he faces the teen. Jesse shifts from foot to foot, as if unsure about what to say. "Well?" He demands in a gruff voice.